What witty special physical and/or mental gifts do you currently possess ?

I have the rare ability to see a thread like this, an opportunity to post the first sarcastic reply...and pass it up.

I can lick my own elbow, but after breifly flirting with the idea of joining the Moscow Circus and superstardom , I was brought crashing down to reality after searching for this on youtube and seeing that many people can do this.

Can levitate

i can do long division in my head

Autism

i can correct the grammar of the op, but i choose not too

I have a huge penis.

On rare occasions when wiping after pooping there is no poop on the paper.

I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart
But you've got being right down to an art
You think you're a genius-you drive me up the wall
You're a regular original, a know-it-all
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else

Okay, so you're a rocket scientist
That don't impress me much
So you got the brain but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night

The TV show Heroes was based on my friends & I

I can immediately sense where a woman is in her menstrual cycle.

Mother****er. I came in thinking I was all special for being able to do this too, and instead I get brought crashing back down to earth.

It's a shame you decided to use the wrong 'too.'

He didn't say he had the special power of correcting his own grammar