Going to see a counsellor is a complete waste of time in most cases and for OP it is not even a question. He is not being honest and his goal in coming here is just to get affirmation. He knows that a good portion of OOT are fairly ****ed up in the same way so between those and the people who embrace psychiatry he knows he'll get that affirmation. OP has almost zero chance of fixing himself.

**** the haters, OP is pulling righteous tail AND pwning standardized tests; what more do you non-self-actualized sheep want from him? A Noble Prize? LOL. Self-Hating Dude, keep on letting your furry freak flag fly, livin' the life imo.

OP, if you pay me and do EVERYTHING I tell you to do, I will fix you. Think of me as your totalitarian life coach. PM me if interested.

wait i want that

too much words, but good luck op.

Alobar, fix me too.

itt, people are furious that a guy who claims to be a narcissist actually sounds like one in his OP.

everybody mad that op has had sex with a woman

OP reminds me a bit of the focal character of Good Old Neon. (Warning: it's an even longer read than the OP.)

Everyone is salvageable if they are willing to do a lot of work.

If by serious psychological issues you mean some sort of brain chemistry imbalance that requires life long medication, no. If you mean some personality pathology and a highly distorted way of viewing the world and yourself, yes, but your issues are fairly common.

You learn to stop manipulating people by not manipulating people. You learn to stop changing people and being a narcissistic self-centered guy by not doing those things you've done in the past.

There is no magic bullet. You need to fundamentally overhaul the way you think about the world and about yourself. The odds of you being able to do that without some sort of professional guidance are not good, IMO. The good thing is you appear to have some insight and a desire to change. But those two things without actively CHANGING YOUR BEHAVIORS will only result in you becoming even more wrapped up in your head, which is where most of your problem lies.

Lol dude how much for that ****?

jmakinmecrzy is bang on.

One question I have though, OP, is what part of yourself is it that you're hiding from?

I'm interested on what makes you think he has insight. Could you elaborate?

Some insight.

Because he's self-labeling/identifying some of his problem behaviors. That's huge for some people. It's shocking how many people will come in to talk to a counselor or therapist and complain about how ****ty their life and relationships are, yet somehow sincerely believe that it has nothing to do with them. In their head, it's all outside of their own behaviors and is done TO them, not BY them.

The question is, is he just saying these things, or does he really believe them?

IMO this is merely one of the main differences between the narcissiat and the sociopath. The sociopath is self aware but does not seek or want change.

I charge by the hour for that sort of in depth analysis.

Odds are good that sometimes he believes it and sometimes not.

I don't think I am awesome, I actually do not like the person I am at the moment. I came here because there are generally some thinking people on this forum that offer some decent advice.

Also, I don't think my fate is terrible. I don't think my situation is terrible.

I wanted to tell my story as bluntly as possible (obviously there is some inherent bias) and get feedback. As a person who doesn't open up to too many people in my life, I thought by posting my situation here I would get a better feeling if many of these things are "normal" or if all of them are not normal.

Perhaps I do have some narcissistic tendencies and there is no doubt I need to work on becoming more secure in my own skin. I guess I was more looking for input on how screwed I am. Once you realize you can be dishonest and manipulate people, I imagine it's pretty hard to stop doing that and that scares the crap out of me.

Hi Tuuufts-

I would PM you, but my account is too new. Do you mind sharing some titles?

A) Is probably accurate
B) Is most certainly not the case. If I loved myself, I would treat those around me better.
C) Is what I am trying to figure out. I want live a fulfilling, purposeful life.

@ SGT: You know more than me about this, clearly; but I just got the feeling he was deluded and anything that could be seen as insight was just more falsity covering up whatever it is he is hiding from.

I thought I was being absolutely honest here. That is why I came. It is very hard for me to open up completely IRL. I am always protecting my ego when talking to others.

It's certainly possible. But even some minimal insight ("I don't like my life and who I am, and that's on me") is better than none ("I don't like my life, and everything around me should change to fix it.")

Thanks. This is my favorite advice in the thread. The problem with me is motivation. For the next month or two months this will be easy, it's when I stop being so cognizant of it that I fall back into bad habits.

I absolutely, 100% believe them. You can only bang your head into a wall so many times before you realize you are the problem. I am easily irritable and I can only blame the world around me for being stupid for so long.

Being the center of your own universe does not necessarily mean loving yourself. I think it's interesting you made that leap.