What's awesome about this is that he also determined that he deserves it instead of the waitress.

In my scenario, I didn't know the person very well who did this. It was the first time I've been out with him. I could only imagine that if I did confront him it would have ended incredibly awkward too. I'd WAY rather just bite the bullet on that one and remember to never go out to eat with him again.

How many of the subjects of these stories are getting summarily friend-dumped?

When i was young i was told i couldn't have a happy meal because the toys made them more expensive. My mother told me to find them in the ball pen when other kids have lost theirs.

This is actually pretty common with all of the really cheap people I know. They'll fight over a friggen dollar when it comes to normal day expenses that everyone should pay, but they'll blow a few grand on some collectible item that seems important to them.

He shouldn't have to ask you guys for $$, he took the time to buy all the stuff and cook, you guys should automatically pitch in.

That's got to be a 2.5-3 hour walk right?

just wondering whats the deal with going out and "buying a round of drinks for everyone", whats the purpose of it ? in my new "environment" thats very common, and its really uncomfortable for me...i mean am i really supposed to buy drinks for 10 people which is my whole weeks earning, when i dont even plan to drink more than 3 for myself, and we never get more then 3 drinks together anyway before everyone splits up.. i think that system kinda always lead to akwards "hey why didnt he pay a round" etc, much better to pay for oneself..

and i do have a tale of the stinge. an old friend would pull this move - he would call you up and say like "hey want to go to taco bell?" you'd get there, go inside, and he'd make sure to be in front of you in line. he'd place his order, then step aside and point at you to place your order on the same bill. if you gave a cross expression, he would say "you got me, right?" as if it was to be unstatedly understood that by accepting his invitation you would be paying for his food

there was a variant method as well, where if he was called out on having a "you got me, right?" planned ahead of time, he would say that this time he just got paid and does have money. so you go, order placed, then he pats his pockets and with an academy-award winning look of incredulous disbelief on his face would say "dude, no way..." indicating that he had somehow coincidentally forgotten his wallet.

i was telling another friend about these behaviors, and he seemed to recognize the moves. by the time i got to the end of describing "dude, no way" he already knew what the final words were because he had already been subject to the same performances.

I have an ex-friend that did this all the time, but he kind of lives on credit anyway, so it took me a while to figure out what was going on. I always get seperate bills with motherlickers like this. Definitely a factor in his defriending. Like a lot of other things in this thread, this goes beyond stinginess into stealing, but in a related fashion I suppose.

I saw a similar one once.

At the studio one day: "Hey, I'm going to Subway. You guys want anything?" Douche goes "Yeah, a 6" meatball sub". Everyone else orders. Someone comes in and says "I want Subway too. I'll pay." Douche changes his order "12" Italian sub double meat, double cheese"

ARGH SO TILTING

Before he started his little scam of scooping up our cash and paying with his credit card and leaving a minimal tip, he'd look for reasons not to leave a tip on his portion of the total bill -- which would result in our total bill having a slightly smaller tip unless the rest of us kicked in a few bucks more to cover the difference.

For instance, if there were five of us and our bills were $50 each, we'd each throw in $60 to give the waitress a 20% tip. However, the one cheapskate would announce that he wasn't happy with the service and wouldn't be leaving a tip on his portion. So now instead of us leaving a 20% tip, the tip would be about 16% or so. What would inevitably happen is that someone would angrily throw in another $10 to not short-change the waitress, and the cheapskate would say something to the effect of "If that's what you want to do, go ahead, but I don't think she deserves it".

Some of the "reasons" he gave for not tipping (sometimes more than one reason would be presented at the end of the meal):

1) Server didn't bring refills fast enough.
2) Server interrupted us while we were talking in order to take our order.
3) Server didn't take our order quickly enough.
4) Server took too long to bring us our food (even if the restaurant was completely packed and you could see the server running him/herself ragged).
5) Server brought us our bill without us having asked for it, making him feel that we were being hurried out the door.
6) Server was rude in some way that only the cheapskate noticed.

And my favorite:

7) Server "auctioned off the food". What this means is that the server would bring us our meals, but had forgotten who had ordered what. The server would announce what each meal was, and would wait for someone to claim it as their own. The cheapskate thought that this was completely unacceptable. Usually he'd sarcastically mutter "Go ahead and auction off the food" as the server announced what was on each plate, making everyone uncomfortable.

Eventually we all stopped wanting to go our for meals with him, and stopped inviting him along. Him stealing from us with his credit card scam was the final straw. It was amazing how much less stressful our dinners were without him being there.

really though, **** people like that.

Eat corn on a bus at 8:30am, midtown Manhattan.

wat

lol, thought op said strangest

haha I worked for HD too like 5-10 years ago and people (me) did this all the time.

Which also reminded me of the stingiest thing I've ever seen someone do...People used to return Christmas Trees looking for a refund -- ON BOXING DAY. WITH TINSEL STILL HANGING OFF THEM. Since it was in their 14 day "no questions asked" return policy, the idiots in management would give them their monies...

I had a dream about this thread last night. It was a fitful sleep.

One of my customers asked me for one of my envelopes when he picked up his print job. Couple weeks later his cheque arrives in my envelope, with my logo covered with White-out.

Among the items in his order was 500 envelopes.

^^Advanced planned stinginess/doucheness itt. This one made me laugh. The 500 envelope punchline did its job!

Hahahahaha

A friend of a friend of my mother had a husband that would stand outside the bathroom whenever a guest was using it and hand out toilet paper, one square at a time.

My father's old employer was a notorious cheapskate. Once the employer and all his employees went to a traditional swedish christmas dinner. This is basically a monster buffet with a set price and you can eat all you want. Cheap employer then proceeds to start off the dinner with a big ass bowl of caviar. This way he could then "make a profit" on the rest of the meal

LOL@ yarbles.. the cali scene is the best in the world.... "i get bomb exotics from canada" is just ******ed.. where do you think canada gets there genetics? where do you think the world gets its genetics????

I think the most tilting part is people not confronting the other people about this ****, except for that coffee shop guy and the dollar bill waiter, which was awesome...

I wonder what it would be like to have an intervention with say, the guy who constantly begs people for some of their food. "Dude, I gotta talk to you. Please stop shamelessly begging your peers for food."