Pursuit of women: Cultural obligation or actually enjoyable? - Page 4 - Other Topics Forum - Discuss Pop Culture, Arts and Entertainment

Teebor · 07-16-2012, 06:22 PM

I agree with OP. For me the effort involved in pursuing women is nowhere near worth the reward of actually having sex with them. It's not like I'm some sort of frustrated virgin either. I think I've sexed 25+ girls and I'm 30 just now but havent had sex in 4 years. I just prefer staying home and jerking off. It's so much easier with the same end result.

Clare Quilty · 07-16-2012, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nullspace

Well I never said society is wrong. The members of society are certainly creating suffering for me, but I am not the centre of the universe (and everyone experiences suffering).

It's interesting that you are calling this a rationalization because it seems like that is a common response to ideas that kind of go against "the norm". It is important to note that calling something a rationalization is not really an argument (it's more just name calling), and it has very little persuasive value to someone like me.

And yeah I concede that biological forces are the main reason for reproductive instincts, but I also believe that a lot of the suffering the arises out of these kinds of pursuits are inflicted by societal pressures and not just biology. Also, when someone's biological desires are not in line with society's then one has to fear persecution either indirectly or directly.

You said women/sex/relationships are an "ordeal" and "obligation" put on "us" by society. That sounds like you think society is wrong about this.

(Btw, the fact that you think women and sex and relationships are "ordeals" makes me feel like this conversation will be fruitless from the beginning).

I mean, Idk what there really is to say. You've had a bad time in your one sexual encounter. Try having more. Everyone is not wrong about sex and love, etc. Also, who are these people raking you over the coals and causing you to suffer over your lack of sexual experience? Soundsl ike you need new friends.

pokerjo22 · 07-16-2012, 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demokritosdeath

In all of the recent OOT threads on this topic, multiple posters are strongly opposed to "overthinking" or "overanalysis". What does this even mean? Isn't analysis good? Isn't that how we learn things? How is it possible to overdo it?

For most people social interaction is enjoyable and natural. There is no need to think about it or analyze it. Its like a joke - once you start analyzing it all the fun is lost.

McKaig · 07-16-2012, 06:34 PM

A smokin' hot chick makes me want to get laid, not society. Just look at that ass and titties.

Maybe you have less lobito then the average guy? Maybe get that checked out.

I work with a guy that's like 5'5" 320lbs.. just a gross dude.. and he's getting laid. It's not hard, so I think the ldo thing to do is get wasted and release the Hoover Dam onto the first lucky lady that will let you?

I can only imagine the relief that will bring you. And it's addictive in a good way.

Good luck man!

demokritosdeath · 07-16-2012, 06:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pokerjo22

For most people social interaction is enjoyable and natural. There is no need to think about it or analyze it. Its like a joke - once you start analyzing it all the fun is lost.

Hmmm. Sounds too simple to be true, but maybe you're right. I mean, I know there are people that seem to be always at ease in these spots, but I figured there was some degree of faking it involved.

To me, there is a whole lot of illogicality on display in any typical interaction. This is why I reject them. When I was younger I tried to push that out of my head and just "go with it", mainly because that's what people told me to do, but it didn't lead to any "results", and I found the whole thing to be annoying and indecipherable. Wandering in the jungle without a map, so to speak.

gumpzilla · 07-16-2012, 07:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demokritosdeath

To me, there is a whole lot of illogicality on display in any typical interaction. This is why I reject them.

Consider that things may look illogical but have a deeper underlying logic to them that you don't perceive.

pokerjo22 · 07-16-2012, 07:45 PM

Ay, this thread is getting too bizarre for me. Its like a bunch of androids trying to figure out humans.

demokritosdeath · 07-16-2012, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gumpzilla

Consider that things may look illogical but have a deeper underlying logic to them that you don't perceive.

Well, maybe, but in that case people should point this alleged logic out.

Quote:

Originally Posted by pokerjo22

Ay, this thread is getting too bizarre for me. Its like a bunch of androids trying to figure out humans.

I appreciate the compliment

JeremyLinFan · 07-16-2012, 07:49 PM

Quote:

1) How old are you?
22

2) Are you a virgin? (If "yes", please skip to Question 5)
Depends on your definition. Oral sex only, but I'll answer the questions anyway.

3) How many times have you had sex in your life?
Once (so one partner).

4) On a scale of 1 to 10, how enjoyable is sex relative to other activities you enjoy?
It was terrible, but something went horribly wrong. I won't go into much detail, but there was blood.

5) How many women have you dated that referred to you as her "boyfriend"?
Zero.

6) Have you ever paid for sexual activity of any kind (e.g. strip club "extras", massage with full release, prostitue etc).? If so, would you do it again?
Never.

OP - so to summarize, you are a 22 year old virgin who has never had a girlfriend. And your only significant sexual experience was a, uh, I guess, bloody blowjob of some sort?

Anyhoo - based on that alone, probably CQ's advice is the best line to take imo:

Quote:

I mean, Idk what there really is to say. You've had a bad time in your one sexual encounter. Try having more. Everyone is not wrong about sex and love, etc. Also, who are these people raking you over the coals and causing you to suffer over your lack of sexual experience? Soundsl ike you need new friends.

philanderer · 07-16-2012, 08:24 PM

life basically revolves around sex, our main goal in life that we are biologically hardwired for is to pass our genes on to the next generation. if we dont do this we will always feel that our life is lacking something. this pursuit of women that you claim society has pushed on everybody is simply nature at work.

you see some pretty extreme examples of it in the animal kingdom, there is some type of male insect that allows the female to eat him after he has mated with her to give her energy to bear his children

**Gizmo** · 07-16-2012, 09:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demokritosdeath

I disagree with the bolded. Is there any evidence of this? Are the orgasms one can achieve by one's self "psychologically inferior" (it's funny phrasing but youknowwhatImean) to ones achieved with a partner?

This is physiological, but it's a difference in the brain between self-induced orgasm and orgasm achieved with another.
http://gawker.com/5804402/heres-what...you-masturbate

ntanygd760 · 07-16-2012, 09:56 PM

The only thing better than love is the journey through lust to find it. imo

nullspace · 07-16-2012, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clare Quilty

You said women/sex/relationships are an "ordeal" and "obligation" put on "us" by society. That sounds like you think society is wrong about this.

(Btw, the fact that you think women and sex and relationships are "ordeals" makes me feel like this conversation will be fruitless from the beginning).

I mean, Idk what there really is to say. You've had a bad time in your one sexual encounter. Try having more. Everyone is not wrong about sex and love, etc. Also, who are these people raking you over the coals and causing you to suffer over your lack of sexual experience? Soundsl ike you need new friends.

I leave it up to the reader to determine whether society is "wrong" in this regard. I try to avoid vague subjective judgements like right and wrong. I am merely making the case that society's pressures cause suffering.

I have never been directly attacked by friends due to this topic. It is more the indirect pressure of society perpetuated by popular movies and television shows that bothers me. But also when people ask questions (without the intent to cause harm) such as "why aren't you hitting on those girls over there?" or other similar questions about relationships.

nullspace · 07-16-2012, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demokritosdeath

Hmmm. Sounds too simple to be true, but maybe you're right. I mean, I know there are people that seem to be always at ease in these spots, but I figured there was some degree of faking it involved.

To me, there is a whole lot of illogicality on display in any typical interaction. This is why I reject them. When I was younger I tried to push that out of my head and just "go with it", mainly because that's what people told me to do, but it didn't lead to any "results", and I found the whole thing to be annoying and indecipherable. Wandering in the jungle without a map, so to speak.

regpostergimmick?

Paul Openfold · 07-16-2012, 10:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nullspace

It is more the indirect pressure of society perpetuated by popular movies and television shows that bothers me. But also when people ask questions (without the intent to cause harm) such as "why aren't you hitting on those girls over there?" or other similar questions about relationships.

ygos?