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When I was a junior in college, there were a bunch of rumors that a friend of mines (Matt) dad killed himself early one morning. Later that night I went to a mutual friends (Ryans) house to drink. When I got there, Matt was the only other person there. I immediately started telling him how glad I was he was there, because I had heard some terrible rumors earlier in the day, and I was so glad that they weren't true, and that he was here having a drink with us.
Matt's dad really did kill himself that morning obviously. Matt was the one who found the body hanging from the doorway of his church early that day. Easily the most awkward/terrible thing that I've ever said.

My friend's mom just died in a car accident and she just found out. She was crying and so were all of her friends. This jackass came up, who was always a jackass, and said: "What? Did someone die?"

This "Did someone die/Who died" phrase is causing a lot of pain and suffering. Best to avoid it altogether.

Wouldn't be so bad if people would just quit dying.

When I was a small child maybe around five years old I thought it was funny to call everything retarded, It didn't matter what Mom & Dad, the Cat the TV whatever.

I think it was just something I was doing randomly one day maybe when someone told me what the word meant.

Our neighbors came over a father and son the son the son was an adult by the way, to give my parents some tomatoes they had grown and wanted to share " are those retarded tomatoes " I asked.

Yeah my neighbors adult son was retarded, I didn't know that he was I just thought of him as a guy that talked a little different.

My parents were embarrassed and told the neighbors they were sorry I didn't know better or something along those lines, I got yelled at a little afterwards and I never asked that question of anyone again.

At work there's a girl that has a leg amputated that sits relatively near me. I was talking to my circle of friends about my co-worker needing to dump this guy that she's in a bad relationship with. I responded to her "but I love him" with, "well yeah, but sometimes you gotta chop the bad leg off at the knee to save it" as said amputee came by on her crutches.

Not me. I repeat not me .
I'm in high school with a girl with a bone disease that caused her facial features to be elongated.
Like that kid in the movie
" Mask".
We are in class as the bell rings,just before roll call.
Its dead quiet as a guy walks by her desk,looks at her all serious and says"why the long face?"
Entire class busts out in laughter.
She is crushed.
Guy is pretty proud of himself as class clown.
She never comes to class again.
She went home and committed suicide that night.

I told my mom she must be getting Alzheimer's in front of this guy who unbeknownst to me his mother died of it. He informed me. Awkward.

I was at a music festival, it was during the day and I was standing at the back of a big tent, still pretty ****ed up from the night before. I saw a guy coming out of the tent/towards me on crutches with a plaster cast on one leg. As he got level with me I leaned forwards and asked him 'did you do that at the festival or was it already like that when you got here?' (yeah idk why I wanted to know that).

The second the words were out of my mouth I realised that there was actually no plaster cast and he had a withered leg. Horrible second of realisation that there was nothing else I could possibly say to explain that one so I simply ran away

Back in high school I played for the golf team. I got to be pretty good friends with a golfer from a nearby school. We had the same spot on our teams and our schools went to a lot of the same tournaments so we played a bunch of rounds together over several years.

Eventually I ran into him at a grocery store or something and immediately noticed that he had a shiny, completely bald head. I guess before then I had only ever seen him with a hat on but for some reason I had it in my head that he always had some kind of hair.

"Hey bud, you shaved your head? You look like a cancer patient!"

"Umm, yeah dude I have alopecia I've never had any hair."

"..."

Luckily he was super easy going and immediately forgave me and never really seemed to hold it against me. I still feel like a piece of **** about it though. I really have no idea what I was thinking, it just kinda came out.

When I was 16 I was seeing this girl. We talked on AIM all the time because out of area code calls were expensive. Once she was at her cousin's house and was IMing me on her little cousin's SN. After that her cousin would message me once in a while and I'd chat with her because she was 11 or 12 and liked to ask me questions about high school or w/e.

One day I had recently downloaded a song that I really liked and just kept playing it over and over so I tried to send it to her (the cousin) and she rejected it. I tried again and she rejected it again.

M: Take the song I think you'll like it!
H: How am I going to listen to it?
M: You don't have a mp3 player on your computer? (back when you needed winamp or something)
H: No. I don't listen to music.
M: You don't listen to music!? What are you... satan or something?
H: ... really?
M: who doesn't listen to music!?
H: I'm deaf...

Whoops

lol god cringed just reading this

I missed that one. That is funny. I could see that one in a movie or sitcom - gotta have the dad smacking the kid in the head saying 'what the hell are you thinking boy?'....'i dunno, i just thought it's what you say...' whack...all in front of the lady.

ham were you physically disciplined as a child? seems like something a parent would say as they swung the rod