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If you cup your hand directly of your a**hole while you're ripping a** you can actually throw your fart. I do it to my gf all the time.....kinda useful if you're trying to clear out a crowded area semi discreetly too.
If you cup your hand directly of your a**hole while you're ripping a** you can actually throw your fart. I do it to my gf all the time.....kinda useful if you're trying to clear out a crowded area semi discreetly too.
Lol. A guy I went to elementary school with used to call these "cup-a-farts" and actually did it to a teacher in grade 7. Teacher was the biggest pushover and our class was the meanest. At least once a week the class would agree on a time and sing happy birthday to him. Jerk kids.
- if you have trouble with eating sweets like ice cream, especially late at night , and you want to stop... Try freezing grapes And eating those instead
- when you call your credit card company about a late fee or interest rate hike , don't tell them about how pissed off you are and how you can't believe you have a late fee for being one day late ... Apologize and the key is to remember you have to actually ask the rep to remove it ... This works much better then calling in pissed off and complaining.
- vaccuum cleaners are insanely disgusting and although they clean to a very limited extent, they mainly just blow dust , bacteria , and foul orders around from the bag or canister in your home in the air while simultaneously pushing the dirt in your carpet deeper down. Even expensive ones like Kirby and dyson . Dyson may not lose suction, but it loses airflow. Your best option health wise and cleaning wise is a rainbow cleaning system/ air treatment system. Expensive as all hell though.
- clip your dogs nails often and take them for walks often . A lot of people have dogs and don't realize how much these two things if not done consistently are super neglectful.
I read the first few pages and saw some mediocre advice on traffic tickets. Wanted to give my thoughts. tl;dr of course but I've gotten this experience as someone pulled over a bunch and as an attorney fighting my own tickets, so it might be worth it. I've also spoken to cop friends.
First of all, there's no surefire way to get out of a ticket. As has been said, it's dependent on the officer, but there are other considerations like whether the officer is near his de facto quota (yeah yeah, there aren't official quotas, but google it if you want to see how a lot of municipalities get around that) and how much the city relies on traffic citations for revenue.
I drive through a small town that preys on out-of-towners and is absolutely merciless in its tickets. The speed limit drops/increases from 65-30/30-65 in a very small stretch, so it's very easy to be going 25 over if you're not paying attention. (I've gotten ticketed twice there despite my awareness.) I went to court and almost everyone had out-of-town plates--a courtroom absolutely packed with people in a town with only 1000 residents. That town needs that revenue and no amount of obsequiousness or being "real" with the officers will get you out of a ticket.
As for the times a cop is amenable to letting you off the hook, again, it depends on the officer. Of course you can stick your hands out the window palms up and hope the officer appreciates your thoughtfulness. Whether the cop would rather hear an attempt at an excuse or just admit you were wrong or if playing dumb will work, there is no right answer. Saying "I don't know, I was just watching the road" can be construed as "I was too busy paying careful attention to the road" or "I can't be bothered to realize how fast I'm going." Maybe the cop got in late to work because of a traffic jam is more open to the excuse of "I'm running late for work, sorry."
Someone earlier mentioned that whether you admit fault or not doesn't matter because it's merely a traffic violation and not a "statute" violation. Don't know where that came from, but if you plan on contesting the ticket, DO NOT admit you were speeding. The cop will absolutely tell the judge what you said. In fact, don't say anything you don't want a judge to hear.
If you do plan on contesting a ticket, here are a couple pointers. First of all, depending on the severity of the ticket, you don't need an attorney. Merely showing up in court is oftentimes enough to get some type of reduction. I've never not had tickets reduced/thrown out by throwing myself at the mercy of the court. But make sure you have some type of legitimate explanation.
Get information about the court/judge. Call the clerk's office to see what the procedure is. Certain courts are more formal than others, and you don't want to be caught off guard when you get called up and the judge asks you how do you plead. You might even consider going on an earlier court date to check it out.
One huge thing is to find out whether the judge is/was actually an attorney. Often, traffic judges are not and never have been a lawyer, so they don't want to argue evidentiary issues or cases they know nothing about. They just want to hear what you have to say and try to get the city some revenue without wasting a lot of time on you.
Probably my best advice is actually learning what the law is. You don't have to be a lawyer to read and understand a statute (although it sometimes helps). In Georgia, for the most part you cannot get prosecuted for a ticket unless you're going over 10 over the speed limit. (A cop might give you a ticket, but the ticket won't stand. So you usually just won't get stopped.) Once I found that out, I set my cruise control to 9 over and I haven't gotten a ticket in forever. Also, check your local laws on whether a cop must ask you if you want to check his radar gun. In Georgia, if the cop doesn't offer, the tickets will get thrown out. I've gotten three tickets thrown out for this alone. (This doesn't work if you admit speeding--another reason not to admit anything.)
One last bit of advice. Don't be intimidated by traffic cops. I know sometimes being fawningly apologetic is the advice given, but if you legitimately think it was an unfair stop, stand up for yourself. My last ticket was so unreasonable that I finally gave up the "I'm sorry, officer" routine and excoriated the officer, and it was one of the most cathartic experiences of my life. Yeah, I got the tickets anyway, but I didn't feel like a neutered puppy. (brag: got the tickets thrown out because I argued so long with the officer he forgot to ask me if I wanted to inspect the radar gun.) Traffic laws are just like any other laws--even if there's a technical violation, there are unreasonable applications of the law and you should call the cop out for being a goddamn automaton if he can't use his discretion reasonably. You will feel a lot better about yourself no matter the outcome.
- vaccuum cleaners are insanely disgusting and although they clean to a very limited extent, they mainly just blow dust , bacteria , and foul orders around from the bag or canister in your home in the air while simultaneously pushing the dirt in your carpet deeper down. Even expensive ones like Kirby and dyson . Dyson may not lose suction, but it loses airflow. Your best option health wise and cleaning wise is a rainbow cleaning system/ air treatment system. Expensive as all hell though.
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