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| Other Other Topics Discussion of arts & entertainment, pop culture, food & drink, health and exercise, fashion, relationships, work, and just about anything else in life except poker, sports, religion and politics. |
07-13-2012, 12:17 PM
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#121
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old hand
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Creek Nation
Posts: 1,293
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
OP needs a job, just don't make the same mistake I did and try and make it ur social life too.
The advice already given about hobbies and activities is great IMO.
You said you like electronics. Get a job at Radio Shack.
1. you make commission
2. even though it's retail, you don't have tons of traffic all **** day...
3. you (used to) like electronics
4. they might work with ur schedule so it wont cut into any other activities you may get into
start job at RS--->work ur way up to Store Manager---->hot milf needs help w her videocamera one day---->hot milf is turned on by young stud Store Manager---->hot kinky sex in the back office w/ camera running---->upload video to 2p2
See? Think positive, and just imagine the possibilities!!
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07-13-2012, 01:21 PM
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#122
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adept
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 976
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
OP, I've been in your shoes before. It sucks, I know. You need to get out of the house. Small steps are very important. Here are some tricks I learned.
Get up at the same time every day. 7 AM is good. The first few days will suck. There is no doubt about it. But make sure you get up at the same time. Even if you fall asleep at 5 AM, get up at 7 AM. You'll sleep fine that night.
Go to bed at the same time every night. It's just as important as getting up at the same time.
Stop drinking soda.
Join a gym and make it a job. Go at the same time every day and say hi to the person that scans your tag. Each time, say something different, but always greet the person. "Hey, what's up?" or "How you doing?" Don't just say "Hi." and leave it at that. I guarentee you after a few days, that person will start noticing you and eventually start chatting with you when you get there. It may take a week or 2, but it will happen. You'll become a familiar face at a familiar time and people like that.
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07-13-2012, 02:38 PM
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#123
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adept
Join Date: May 2012
Location: 15 miles to the love shack.
Posts: 1,188
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
tl;dr beyond the part where you said something like, "worried that an old aquaintance(girl) would go in for a hug." That's the **** that should be inspiring you! Who the **** doesn't like it when girls hug them? When they press their tits against you!! WTF you need a doctor. There are plenty of girls that feel just like you. They're overweight. They have low self esteem. Some people can't do it alone. /rant.
Maybe that'll come across the wrong way. I hope not because I know just how you feel. You might think that a Dr will somehow keep you from being yourself. In fact it's the opposite. A Dr will help you be yourself.
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07-13-2012, 07:46 PM
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#124
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newbie
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 38
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by lonely_but_rich
I think getting away from your neighbors who are listening to you through the walls 24/7 and judging you would help your stress. I like to drive into the mountains sometimes and fish a stream when I'm feeling stressed. It's nice just to relax your mind.
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Good idea, being in the nature is quite nice.
I've been thinking lately of picking up fly-fishing, seems pretty fun.
Quote:
Originally Posted by wazz
Two things:
Regarding embarassment, everyone gets embarassed after making a mistake, and making mistakes is a human thing. Some people are better than others at hiding it. Try saying 'whoops!' and brushing it off. I mean really, TRY. Nothing will come of your life if you don't at some point try to do something.
The something can be a really small thing. The 'baby steps' philosophy is an important one. Think of it this way; did you find yourself where you are now as a result of one huge event? Or has it been a series of baby steps? When I was depressed, the main thought going through my head at all times was that one specific thing could, SHOULD happen to me that would change my life - a pretty girl knocks me over, feels responsibility for me and helps me become the person i'm supposed to be, or i meet a pretety girl that turns out to be a poker player and i help her improve and she helps me become the person i'm supposed to be, i have a near-death experience and it shocks me into becoming the person i'm supposed to be (and meet a nurse, or something, i dunno). The responsibility for change is always elsewhere if you're looking for huge hey-presto changes. Don't get me wrong, it could happen, and that would be awesome, but it's a million-to-one shot, and I'm not that much of a gambler.
Don't put too much pressure on yourself to turn things round overnight. You will not be able to. Don't think that getting out of this situation you've found yourself will be easy. It will require a long, long period (you may never recover fully) of resetting your faulty thought processes and hangups. You will have to make sacrifices and shake yourself up. But you will have to try. If you don't try, you're giving up. You can do it. You may not know exactly what needs to be done, but you know there's one thing you can do right now that sets you on the right path to fixing your life. You always have the choice, to do that one thing, right now, that might be the smallest of baby steps, but that you know, deep down, is the only way you can dig yourself out.
Once you make that initial, grand leap, keep on giving yourself a pep talk, congratulate yourself, FIGHT the negative thoughts in your head, the ones that say 'you'll never make it, what's the point in trying? you're a worthless POS'. Those aren't your voices. YOU are the only person responsible for yourself. YOU have to rouse yourself from this slumber.
Make the choice.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2E3JD...ailpage#t=105s
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Hi wazz. I feel pretty much the same way, like things should just happen for me.
I do put a whole lot of pressure on myself, and I know I shouldn't but don't really know how to stop.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mad_mardigan
OP I know you mentioned cashier as a possible job that you would like. It has some benefits, but it has its problems too.
Yes, you want to get out of the house and meet cool, outgoing, friendly, smart, trustworthy people of integrity. If you need to get a job to do that, cashier may not be the best option.
I'm a cashier at a Wal Mart in a small college town in Oklahoma.
Yes, I work with mostly girls so that is nice. They're all taken though, and dating co-workers is never a good idea.
However, I'd rather slit my wrists than work any more than I do at that store. The customers are mostly stupid, degenerate rednecks. The type of dummies you come across varies from region to region, but I'm sure you get the idea of people looking down on you and being rude all day. Retail in general blows.....
I've talked to many cashiers who have worked all over the US and for many different companies, and they all say it sucks. So I know I'm not alone here
Cliffs- OP shouldn't get a job as cashier if he wants to meet cool, friendly outgoing people. He'll only meet bums and idiots who want to make him scream.
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I had a cashier-type job before and it was pretty nice. Was in a good neighborhood and a decent amount of nice people to talk to. But that might have been an outlier.
I'm sure most cashier jobs are as you described.
Thanks.
Last edited by lifehelpgimmick; 07-13-2012 at 08:09 PM.
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07-13-2012, 08:15 PM
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#125
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newbie
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 38
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Man
OP, I've been in your shoes before. It sucks, I know. You need to get out of the house. Small steps are very important. Here are some tricks I learned.
Get up at the same time every day. 7 AM is good. The first few days will suck. There is no doubt about it. But make sure you get up at the same time. Even if you fall asleep at 5 AM, get up at 7 AM. You'll sleep fine that night.
Go to bed at the same time every night. It's just as important as getting up at the same time.
Stop drinking soda.
Join a gym and make it a job. Go at the same time every day and say hi to the person that scans your tag. Each time, say something different, but always greet the person. "Hey, what's up?" or "How you doing?" Don't just say "Hi." and leave it at that. I guarentee you after a few days, that person will start noticing you and eventually start chatting with you when you get there. It may take a week or 2, but it will happen. You'll become a familiar face at a familiar time and people like that.
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Sounds like solid advice. Will try getting a wake-up routine going.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob148
tl;dr beyond the part where you said something like, "worried that an old aquaintance(girl) would go in for a hug." That's the **** that should be inspiring you! Who the **** doesn't like it when girls hug them? When they press their tits against you!! WTF you need a doctor. There are plenty of girls that feel just like you. They're overweight. They have low self esteem. Some people can't do it alone. /rant.
Maybe that'll come across the wrong way. I hope not because I know just how you feel. You might think that a Dr will somehow keep you from being yourself. In fact it's the opposite. A Dr will help you be yourself.
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What if she's as disgusted by me as I am? I know I don't like fat people, I would assume most people agree. So don't want to put her or myself in such a situation. If that makes any sense to you.
Regarding the psychologist, that exactly how I feel. I don't want to change who I am, sort of. And I feel that is what the doctor will do.
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07-13-2012, 08:56 PM
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#126
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banned
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: { }
Posts: 1,863
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Wow I just realized regpostergimmick and lifehelpgimmick are two different people.
There are too many gimmicks right now!
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07-14-2012, 09:43 AM
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#127
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adept
Join Date: May 2012
Location: 15 miles to the love shack.
Posts: 1,188
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by lifehelpgimmick
What if she's as disgusted by me as I am? I know I don't like fat people, I would assume most people agree. So don't want to put her or myself in such a situation. If that makes any sense to you.
Regarding the psychologist, that exactly how I feel. I don't want to change who I am, sort of. And I feel that is what the doctor will do.
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If she's disgusted by you then she probably wouldn't be giving you a hug. Don't assume that most people are as shallow as you are. There are many very nice people out there. My two best friends are somewhat fat. I don't give a **** though, and when they hug me it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. Personal contact is good for you.
But if you're disgusted by the women that you're able to get then there's not much we can do for you besides telling you to lose weight.
Some drs are quacks, for sure, but there are medications for your exact circumstance. If you just give it a chance you might find that the right meds can magnify your good qualities and stifle the bad. I'm living proof of this.
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07-14-2012, 05:13 PM
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#128
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banned
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: { }
Posts: 1,863
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Hugging is stupid.
It makes me feel awkward as **** also.
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07-14-2012, 06:13 PM
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#129
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journeyman
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: your table, being a fish
Posts: 379
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A lot of good advice in the thread.
Now, outside of looking at this forum, what are you doing right now? What time is it where you are?
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07-15-2012, 12:50 PM
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#130
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: ^_^
Posts: 13,889
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by lifehelpgimmick
I have always felt that novels etc are a huge waste of time and as such I only have "fact-books" or what you might call them.
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Do you also feel TV/film is a huge waste of time?
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07-16-2012, 05:35 AM
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#131
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newbie
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 38
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by barondan
A lot of good advice in the thread.
Now, outside of looking at this forum, what are you doing right now? What time is it where you are?
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Not much, going to buy some milk soon.
I'm 6-7h ahead of you (I guess, eastern time)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ToTheInternet
Do you also feel TV/film is a huge waste of time?
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I think it's a waste of time just the same, but I do it anyways. Contradictory, I know.
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07-16-2012, 05:47 AM
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#132
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: The water hemisphere
Posts: 7,970
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Have you changed your sleeping schedule yet?
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07-16-2012, 06:59 AM
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#133
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newbie
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 38
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nichlemn
Have you changed your sleeping schedule yet?
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Started to, woke up at 11 today. Shooting for 9.30 tomorrow
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07-16-2012, 10:53 AM
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#134
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banned
Join Date: May 2011
Location: -EV
Posts: 974
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Re: OOT, I'm in dire need of life help/advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by lifehelpgimmick
Started to, woke up at 11 today. Shooting for 9.30 tomorrow
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Living the dream....................
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07-16-2012, 12:55 PM
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#135
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journeyman
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: your table, being a fish
Posts: 379
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Are there any rock climbing places or groups in your area? I found this to be a very fulfilling activity that has a lot of pluses. Its fun, it has both short term and long tern goals, most everyone I've met rock climbing is super nice and helpful and will come talk to you, its also exercise disquised as fun( I couldn't do a pull up before I started 4 years ago and I'm 30)
Just an idea though. How far away is the shop you get your food at?
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