https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...t-do-they-mean

Yeah, they are one of the most common fantasies. It's just a really hard core version of being taken/dominated, but obviously they don't want to be raped for real.

I'd count myself in that number, I've had some pretty rapey fantasies but seeing as how I've actually been raped, I'd never want THAT again. The trick with a fantasy is that even if the trappings are rape, it's completely consensual (if you follow through with rape play).

There is a huge difference between someone having a rape fantasy in private, and someone openly talking with a partner about acting it out

I'm surprised that difference needs pointing out.

And reading the finding of the study,I don't think rape means what they qualify as it meaning.

Rape is an unwanted sexual act,that's different from forced or dominant .
More women want to be dominated and controlled in the bedroom in consentual sex,ok ...
Rape fantasies...not the same.



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If you read the study, the authors categorise rape as either erotic, erotic-aversive, or aversive so it covers a fair bit of ground.

However, what I was arguing about is that they do not tend to talk about them with men, and actually act it out even less.

No, plenty of women fantasize about actual rape. As in, within the fantasy, they do not want the sex to happen but it does anyway.

Trying to parse out why people fantasize about what they do is really a lost cause tho. It'll differ from person to person (the taboo of it, serious domination desires, erotisizing past trauma) but a) by definition, none of them want to be actually raped and b) how much they want to do any of it in real life, if at all, is a case by case kinda thing.

I think that's what we are arguing is the word "rape"

If women or men are asked
"Do you want to be raped?"
I imagine the positive responses would be negligible.

If asked "Do you fantasize getting raped?"
The study indicated about a third had,not clarifying if it had become a part of their sex life.

But if asked "Do you fantasize about forceful or dominated sex?
Then about 2/3s admit to that.
Again,no follow up on how many do it in sex play.

And it's not a large study,imo.

Don't know if it would really qualify as a scientific study.

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It's a scientific study insofar as when you want to know if people fantasise about rape, then all you can really do is ask them.

What you can't do is take a huge cognitive leap and cite this study as evidence that women want to talk about it with their partner and act this out.

True, but there are still some surprising findings within the study:

Although this in itself does reveal bias within the study methodology (i.e. 21% of the sample having been raped, which is well above the general population level).

I'm not so sure of this, although I guess it depends on the age of the women in the sample. I would expect that more than 21% of women get raped in their lifetime.

The mean age in that study was 20.04(2.41) years old.

Yeah it would also depend on how broadly they defined rape for the study but that stat doesn't shock me at all, which is pretty sad.

Avaliability bias, most likely. Ie, you expect it to occur more often because it seems to gain a lot more attention than more commonly occuring events.

Same idea as to why people think tornados and shark attacks etc etc happen more often than they truly do.

Sharkrapenado just popped into my head.



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has there ever been a documented case of a shark raping a man or woman?

I dunno,but I think dolphins have attempted to rape people.


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the number of memes that come up when you google image "dolphin rape" adds credence your statement.

A larger percentage of women than you might think love getting smashed. It seems that's different from a rape fantasy though.

I've had several that have requested I just take them without telling them what I'm doing from time to time. It's not really my thing but that seems like it's closer to a rape fantasy.

One girl I was dating a couple years ago said the best sex she ever had was with he ex husband 20 years ago. He tied her up in a house that wasn't completed yet. The walls inside had only been framed. He tied her up in between a couple 2X4's and raped her at her request.

I also had a girl I was just banging a month ago specifically ask me if i had rape fantasies. Pretty sure she would have let me do anything i wanted.

Have no idea on the actual stats but it seems like it should be a high number.

How about we abandon the rape talk for a little while?

IDK, with randos I can't imagine trying to get into some weird rape fantasy and see it backfire with some accusations if it doesn't go exactly to plan.

I don't think a dolphin has ever managed to actually, um, penetrate a human, but they do sometimes attack humans and aggressively attempt to mate, yeah. Stories about this pop up pretty regularly. Horny animals be horny. And, apparently, quite indiscriminate in their choice of mating partners.

Horny animals be horny indeed.

According to the helpful young college girl who leads the tours at the Mirage Secret Garden, the standard for dolphin sex is kidnapping and gang rape.

That meme Brandoncia posted cracked me up. Idk it was just the look on the dolphins face