I don't know if you're a douche or not but you're definitely not funny.

nothing wrong with a good culling.or 2 But announcing it to be seen as some kind of social stature is deffo. the height of douchehood.

@Gamblor - How old are you?

If you're anything over like 22 or 23 - I have to go with douchebag and unfunny. If you're under that I'll give you a pass on the douchebag but stick with unfunny.

‎4 weeks equal a month, so 4 weeks ago today (Name removed) was born... I kno its not the 21st today, but look at a calender...


(WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!)

these are the replys....

Lady #1: ‎52 weeks in a year divide by 12 = 4.33 ... 3 more days :-)

(what?? since it was the 18th when this was posted..you reasoned 3 more days to the 21st because 52 divided by 12 is 4.33??? ????WHAT???????)


OP: Lol i know but we are counting her bein a month old today... Thats how they measure your due date when ur prego...

(what?? they measure by months? or what?!?!?! WOW....so many things i could say but...come on..)

Lady #1: lol - yes she is 4 weeks but not yet a mont...

Me: lol

OP's Mother: Now that she is born you count a month by every 21st of the Month.

OP: duh... We arent stupid..

(then why are you saying your baby is a month old today if today isnt the 21st, and the baby was born on the 21st of last month????)


OP's Mother: Duh.... I know that you aren't stupid....never said you were. Don't make me come down there and bust your ass little girl! lol

(see how mother just 'smiles and nods' so as not to embarrass poor daughter of hers)


go back and read the original status..those dots and everything..you can see shes confused just by writing it...lmao..

if she keeps this new formular of age up..shes gona be throwing her baby her sweet 16 party when its really her quince

baked goods,

what?

Seriously?

Sister-in-law's status:

Now works for: "Yes I work, I'm a stay-at-home mom!"

She said don't judge! Also does chronic flatulence count as an 'invisible illness'
?

Try the veal folks.

weird emo/goth chick ,

Funny(beauty reduces teh AIDS)... then made me sad(such a special kind of stupid). Then ended up being funny again(because the world is filled with similar minds, and now I get to see their adverts).

God had a tough call between making sure this guy was STD-free and preventing the tsunami.

Girl I went to college with:

"sweetest thing i've heard in forever...i ordered a dress recently and tried it on to see what xxxxx thought of it, he goes "baby i like it a lot better on you than i did on the model" seriously??? where did you come from???"

I love these irl 'cool guys' who Face**** themselves and expose everyone to the shallow, insecure douche they really are.

hick girl + typo = lolz

haha my fav

That's awesome. You sure she didn't mean "solied"?

Unless you are a comedian working in a comedy club, nobody wants to hear you talk about religion or politics. Unless you are certain that everyone on your feed has the exact same thoughts as you, and in that case, you would want to meet a wider array of people. So just stop already.

Some woman is bad at math and has no brain filter. Always funny.

You see a lot of these. "CEO of Sanderson Household". It just reeks of "I regret not making an impact in the business world and having to throw in the towel and have 3 kids by age 25"

The worst one in mentioning Mensa. Anyone who does that should be put down imo.

lol

so, im chilling on the VIP rooftop of this rooftop bar called Aerie savoring a magret du canard with a side of ecstacy-infused immortality and i came across this thread on my diamond-crusted IPhone 5. SOLID. Gonna have to stop reading soon tho cuz B-Rock is meeting me here for drinks and advice on bitchslapping this economy back into shape. Miight tweet some deets later if the wifi is working on Airforce 1.

Here are some from my FB:

Originally posted by some dumb Libyan dictator

i can't be afraid to let go. letting go doesn't mean that i'm weak, but that i'm strong. god already has something better planned for my future

Originally posted by Some old wannabe musician named Elton

The baby has finally gone to bed. Time for some me time. Being a mommy is the most important job in the world!

Originally posted by some freaky very weird dude who started a poker site

If you have a legal problem, guess how you determine whether or not you need a lawyer. You see a lawyer. Isn’t that weird?

Anyways, gotta run, my Dom Perignon is getting warm. Outtie 5K.

wat

Seriously keep that "u mad" nonsense to SE, especially in response to a thread where we're asking people to post stuff that pisses them off.

dids mad

I really don't get this attitude at all. No, you don't work, you stay at home and take care of your own child. If you ran a daycare or were a nanny or au pair, that would be work.

I don't get how someone considers raising her own child a job? Don't all of us who work full time and more also clean our homes, do laundry, shop, cook.

I guess that makes me a salesperson AND the president of Amber Household LLC.

If someone considers assembling legos with their kid a job, I think they are doing it wrong.

fully agree

I know who a guy who is quite intelligent and works for Google and is always trying to point out/remind people that he is a very smart guy. Irritates me to no end, mostly b/c he has all the social skills of a trash can.