Depression Thread

[plano]

so cynical

[JP]

Originally Posted by plano

OP, I am a mental health professional and have lived with depression the majority of my life. (I like effrexor also)

The answers you seek are within yourself.

Only you can define your happiness.

Your purpose is yours alone. (which makes it unique and special)

Seek it, find it, you control your happiness.

You control your happiness! You have the choice. Choose it!

Depression sucks. You can surpass it, if you truly want it.

Want it, look inward, find your own peace, it is yours alone.

Self-love, inner-peace, mindfullness, compassion, and the love of all things, leads to peace. God is love.

Find your peace. The fact that u are looking, feeling, and seeking, points to your quest for higher meaning. Find youre meaning, u owe it to yourself.

You will get there when it is time.

Recovery is likely when one works toward it. Work toward it!

Originally Posted by stanski

OP, you are a perfect example of why people start doing drugs and drinking. I suggest you take up one or the other as a pastime. At least that way if you are going to be miserable, you will be ****ed up and unmiserable for a little while each part of the day. Hallucinogens can at least open your mind up to all the potentials of the world, even if the feeling is fleeting and temporary you at least can have a ton of hope for humanity for a short period of time.

Not sure if these posts are serious are not. Drink? Drugs? is this advice real, I ask because its not the first time somone has said, get drunk or high.

As for the first post I am unable to read/understand it.

[skudroc]

hello op
i would like to say i suffered from depression. question is, is this illness really cureable?! hard to say, but i feel a lot better today than i was 10 years ago. i was diagnosed with a distinct depressive episode and i had suicidal tendencies. luckily i was very rational with everything and i knew when i would kill myself i would be dead, which i never wanted to be. this may sound ridiculous to thosenever affected by these thoughts, but i can assure you it is far far away from being ridiculous.
nowadays i feel mainly better, cause the suicidal thoughts are gone. but there are still a lot of moments where i / my mind gets depressed.
i dont do sports at all. i believe it can support your state of mind becoming better. but saying sports/eating good n healthy is a sort of therapy is horribly wrong in my opinion.
the only thing to ge you better is professional help from a therapist/analyst.
i did both, psychotherapy and psychoanalysis. i was very lucky (you cant stress this enough) to always have had good therapists/anylists. well, i had 2 therapist and 1 analyst. i also was in an open-psychiatry twice, the first time when the depression and death-wishes were at its peak. at that time i took meds, cant remember what name they had.
(funny note: when i took antidepressivas for the first time i jacked one off.... for like 2 hours. nothing happened. okay... next day going for it again like for 2 hours and no happy ending. i thought the antidepressivas ruined my cumshot ability. they didnt, pretty normal side-effect when starting to take them.)

so after this bio stuff, what can i say?
i think going to a professional is the most important way as i think 98/100 people suffering from depression do have some kind of "pain expierenced in the history" (i cant express it better).

Want it, look inward, find your own peace, it is yours alone.

Self-love, inner-peace, mindfullness, compassion, and the love of all things, leads to peace. God is love.

hearing this from a professional is horrible. these are nothing else than contentless punchlines. it means: either you do it (=get rid of your depression) or you fail. but its up to you! thats the biggest problem: people with depression have a hard time /thee hardest time imaginable to deal with their problems. well, that sound horrible too. i cant express myself too good right now. thats it for the moment.

best of luck yall

[JP]

Hi Skudroc thanks for taking the time to reply. I will seek and have made another appointment with my GP, which in turn will hook me up whoever he feels his right with me, be it psychologist or psychiatrist.

I have seen a psychologist for a few sessions, and it didnt go done well because the scary thing was he was agreeing with most of what I was saying, that lifes hard.

He found me unusual due to the fact that out of all his patients I was only the second person to come to the clinic that actually had a job, and he deals with 40-50 other patients.

He also went on to say that all my arguments or the way I was feeling/talking could be summed up by "All your really saying is you want more money" he expressed an unwillingness to help (maybe he couldnt) but I got the feeling he didnt care, because he was quick to say, and I'm power parsing here, "I cant help, just get more money, either change jobs, work harder at current job or take on another job.

[ganstaman]

Originally Posted by JokerPodcast

I have seen a psychologist for a few sessions, and it didnt go done well

Not everyone's good for everyone. You have to find a therapist you can connect with and feel comfortable with (though that doesn't mean one who just says what you want them to say). Otherwise, it's just a waste of everyone's time.

[plano]

When you are ready to understand my post(s) you will.

Life is just life. Nothing more, nothing less.

By all means if you need meds take them. I love my antidepressants. They will help, but the effects are subtle. Dont forget, we all medicate!

They will help you heal, but only you can truly heal yourself.

Seek therapy, seek personal improvement and acceptance, these journies lead you towards self-actualization. Enjoy the journey.

[JP]

Originally Posted by plano

When you are ready to understand my post(s) you will.

Life is just life. Nothing more, nothing less.

By all means if you need meds take them. I love my antidepressants. They will help, but the effects are subtle. Dont forget, we all medicate!

They will help you heal, but only you can truly heal yourself.

Seek therapy, seek personal improvement and acceptance, these journies lead you towards self-actualization. Enjoy the journey.

Is it just me? I honestly cant understand the first two lines you posted, for the rest of the post okay I will keep taking my meds and seek therapy.

Either I'm really really stupid which is most likely, or you're really stupid or maybe just a troll. In the case you are genuine, thanks for posting and trying to help me but sorry,

This message is hidden because plano is on your ignore list.

[JP]

Originally Posted by ganstaman

Not everyone's good for everyone. You have to find a therapist you can connect with and feel comfortable with (though that doesn't mean one who just says what you want them to say). Otherwise, it's just a waste of everyone's time.

I actually found it real hard here in the UK to find a therapist, no one took notice if I wasnt on the brink of suicide, which I wasnt before I was just depressed. So at first I lied and said I was on the brink of suicide that allowed me to get a waiting list to see someone, meanwhile I was doing CBT and meds which didnt help (or dont help me).

So I phoned lifeline which is a suicide help line, they provided a free programme outside of working hours. I didnt feel it was rather productive a lot of it was "dumbed" down CBT and just open talk about life, but since I have little to no interest in things (other than working and paying bills) it was real hard to engage in any meaningful conversation with her. I felt like I was treated like a 4 year old, for example she would show me a diagram with cartoon men on it and they where climbing this big tree all at different stages, some at the bottom, middle, top, hanging on by a branch, one was stepping on someone else to get a leg up etc...they all different facial experssions some where at the top happy, others at the top but sad etc....so she asked me who I was, I cant remember who I picked someone near the bottom no doubt. And I was like WTF was the point in that?

I hate small talk, because if you were to ask me about my day I could answer you by saying it was the same as yesterday so nothing new has happened between yesterday and today, so nothing more to say.

[JP]

Anyone else here get really bored with life?

[Falken]

Yes

[JP]

May I ask what you do to occupy your time?

[Ron Burgundy]

I was super depressed from age 15-21. I woke up every day wishing it would be my last. I remember walking home from school once when I was like 17 and got hit by a car. I was kinda disappointed when I got up and I was still alive.

The main thing that reduced my depression was poker. It gave me something to occupy my mind all day, and money to move out of my parent's house (my parents were the primary cause of my depression imo). I think the fact that poker was such an in depth intellectual activity kind of distracted me from my own thoughts. The absolute worst thing to do when you're depressed is sit around and think about how depressed you are. Getting immersed in something is what helps me.

I totally understand what you mean by not caring about anything and not desiring anything. I don't either. I think for people with this attitude, having a job or doing things simply as a means to an end makes it worse. We don't care about the ends, so the means are even more meaningless. Worse than meaningless in fact.

Anything you do must be done for the sake of doing it, and don't compromise. That's pretty much all the advice I can give. I don't pretend to have a magic cure for hating life.

[JP]

I played a lot of online poker which I think made my depression worse.

Thanks for the advice.

[JJones]

First post on 2+2. No pressure.

I've read all of your responses and I can relate.

I'm extremely self-destructive but I've never attempted suicide.

For example: Last night I donated $1000 (10 buy-ins at $1-$2 Live) by going all in in the dark, betting in the dark, calling off half my stack with gutshots and missing, -ev bluffs with air and 0 fold equity .. Huge degenerate. I'm not complaining or seeking sympathy because I do this all the time and I enjoyed cracking jokes and throwing a party. Not so much enjoying being broke this morning though.

Cool Story Bro: I attempted to put everything I had in to getting a girl I fell for at work to like me. (Made the mistake of asking her out, getting turned down, then asking her best friend out a week later.)

To counter this and apologize by doing WAY too much I spent over 3-years writing love songs, sending her messages, and basically stalking her over the internet. (But I'm convinced she was subtle in responding to the love songs because I'm not a "terrible" musician and they were kind of cute in a pathetic way.) All I'm saying is if someone is making you one love song a day your going to pay attention after the 50th one or so.

P.S. I gave her 15 of the songs I made for christmas and hand wrote out the lyrics etc. and she gave me a weeks payed vacation by saying the word "restraining order."

I msged her on FB after work and she "told me" she threw it away after I told her I couldn't take it back because she had the rights to all the songs.

Anyway, after being suspended for a week at work, I was brought in to speak to the boss and allowed to keep my job somehow. (This was the 2nd time I was called in to the office for harassing her. He litterally said: "I'm not trying to play God...I'm not a therapist but I don't think your an axe murderer..if I was her father.." And then he ended it all with "I think you'll do good here. " )

I asked him to ask her if she wanted me to quit but he didn't get around to it.

-que dark lighting- I'll never forget how she looked at me as she flew up those flight of stairs, or when I passed her in the hallway. My boss had told me I wasn't allowed to speak to her so I kept my mouth shut. Not because I was afraid of losing my job but out of respect for her. I quit the next day before she got there.

I then proceeded to make three more albums for her.

Christmas the following year she took off all the privacy settings on her facebook and put up responses to my shenangigans. +EV responses. But I was too much of a donkey to go get her right then. I let time go by, I was unable to continue to record songs for her, she lost interest or thought I did, and she was gone - again.

I threw everything away, deleted everything, asked her to block me and set myself on fire.

It was awesome. DDDD

I'd do it again if I could.

[ObezyankaNol]

Depression thread next to favorite beer thread. Problem solved.