I don't think the concerns people have expressed are anything but well-intentioned. I tried to emphasize that I wasn't concerned about OP's love for his GF or his intentions in my post, just that sometimes we don't see these things objectively when we're the ones in the situation. I know I don't always.

It is something of a puzzle for OP to emphasize the paternalistic nature of his relationship with Little Michelle, like telling her what she can and can't eat, but allowing her to consent to sex. It sounds odd and contradictory and people reacted to that. Given that the therapist thinks there is nothing wrong with it then there's not a lot much more to be said, but until people really expressed their concern OP was kind of unspecific about it. I don't think anyone in the thread meant to troll him. I will admit that I may be a bit overprotective of little girls since I was one, but I never thought that OP was intentionally taking advantage of her.

I think OP is pretty great, both as a person and as regarding this thread, but I can't believe he didn't anticipate some probing into his behavior when he said he was sleeping with all of the personalities. That's part of the message board environment, and really, I haven't seen anyone that wasn't clearly wishing the best for both OP and his lady.

How do you know that you're not one of Michelle's multiple personalities?

I'd do it in a heart-beat.

Thanks.

Yeah I can see how that could come across as a little strange. With that I was trying to stress how well we get along in spite of all of this stuff that's happened, and how important it is to me that my relationship with my significant other is like that.

Unless circumstances changed somehow from what they are so far, I wouldn't be afraid of any attacks or harassment against my family or myself. It's possible she would hurt herself out of depression, but that's not really anything new up to this point. I'm sure if something like that happened, her family would make sure she was watched 24/7, or at least I'd hope they would.

Thanks.

I lol'd.

Short side story to go along with this that's kind of related to the clothing thing. When I first met Michelle, she had A cups. This one guy she dated for a while a couple of years before me had ended up cheating on her (and filming it) with a chick who had really big boobs. Michelle found the video, and since then was always very self-conscious about her boobs. When we first started getting in the sack, if she was naked walking around or something, she would hold her hands sort of over her boobs. I was like hey, knock that off, I want to see some tits yo. Okay so since then she's grown a bit, and is to the upper end of B cups. With these relatively new boobs, it changes the clothes game a bit because she's still got some lingering feelings over the boob stuff, and it took her some time to get used to having cleavage I think.

Okay so with that having been said, Little Michelle tends to dress more conservatively than Michelle, and Rebecca tends to dress maybe a little less conservatively than Michelle. With Rebecca #2 and Matilda I don't really have much of a sample size to go on.

As far as movies and stuff go, her switching back and forth has never been much of a problem. The only real problems happen if she has a seizure or passes out and missed some of the movie. Their tastes in things like that don't seem to change much, if any.

We went to see some horror movie last fall, I think it was whichever Saw movie came out last, and Little Michelle was there as the previews started. She passed out and woke up a couple of minutes later as Michelle. I don't know if this was because of the movie or if it might have been variance, but I suspect it had something to do with the movie.

I lol'd. She makes homemade soap, and so I ended up with a 40 lb. block of soap base in a cardboard box on my kitchen table for like a month since I didn't want to have to put it up and drag it out every time she wanted to use it, so maybe that's close?

There are occasionally disagreements between them, but it's usually more along the lines of things that aren't particularly important, or things she's conflicted about herself anyway. Like once she needed to go to the hospital, and "everyone" agreed except for Little Michelle, who for some reason is scared of hospitals. After a little 2-3 minute pep talk, she was ready to go. The most common disagreements between "them" by far happen over stuff she's conflicted about to begin with, like her self-worth and things along those lines.

Thanks.

Could you explain more about how Michelle's different personalities relate to one another? Does a skill learned by one personality carry over to the others? Does each personality feel as if it is its own individual? It seems like a very bizarre, confusing situation from the outside - how do you manage to have a meaningful relationship with five different personalities, all in the same body and seemingly emerging at random? How is your girlfriend able to live life at all and not lose her sanity with all this going on? I can't relate at all, but it sounds like a complete nightmare.

Is it even remotely possible that the chick is kind of "purposely" making up the personalities and is more aware of them then she lets on or even realizes herself? She's still nuts either way of course. But I have to think there is some chance she hits some of these personalities at strangely convenient times and/or just for maximum drama.

I too would have to think that further consultations with another expert or two would be a good idea. I wouldn't just one guy who seems to be so cool with this. Maybe his diagnosis is legit and he's the expert of all experts. But it's so weird and unusual (and some evidently believe is frequently not legit) that his opinion alone wouldn't be good enough for me.

Uh, lol, no. im only a second year law student but my understanding is a) there is no court protected confidentiality between two people engaging in a therapy session... As I understand it therapists themselves in most jurisdictions are bound by an ethical not legal duty... Although he is not a therapist so that is irrelevant b) even if he is under some legal duty I have never heard of before if she told him independently of the session then I assume any pre existing privilege is lifted and c) renderinIg all this moot she gave him full permission to discuss everything. Then again I'm just a law student so maybe noah or a practicing therapist can give more insight

Edit - to be clear there maty be some legal duty I am unaware of or naive to I just don't see how op would be unable to answer that question if he wanted to given her full permission to discuss anything added onto her telling him about it independently... Just would really be curious to hear about the process

Thanks.

Yes, she's following it. I won't get too much into her reactions on some of the things that have been said since that will probably just turn into troll fodder and won't be particularly interesting otherwise, but she's still happy with the decision to let me make this thread.

Thanks.

I would absolutely love this. Please, please, PLEASE do it.

Answered this earlier but basically she would want to be back to normal.

She has an older brother who is about my age. Interestingly enough, he left for Iraq not long after we had been dating, and got back or whatever safely. So whenever she has her amnesia spells, she doesn't even remember him being in Iraq at all.

I've been sitting here thinking about this one for a couple of minutes and I'm having a hard time coming up with a specific one. I've never really been too embarrassed about it. I don't know what that says about me or whatever, but I just don't care too much about how other people perceive it. Pretty much anything that's out of the ordinary in public, or even just around me, embarrasses her, though.

Not to leave you completely story-less: One time that was super weird was we were in a bbq place eating while she was mid-amnesia stuff and she came back to normal or whatever and when she does that she usually doesn't remember anything that happened while she was in her amnesia state. So now she's there, has no idea how she got there, and has half-eaten food in front of her. If I had left to go to the bathroom or something and she'd come out of it without me there, I don't know what would have happened.

Michelle likes to paint a lot and read a lot.

My family is mostly cool with it. My friends just kind of roll with it. I've had chick friends that I've previously dated on and off some that have stopped talking to me since her seizures and personality stuff started. I think they might be hurt that I've committed so much to Michelle and I wouldn't commit to them.

No idea. Michelle and Rebecca did the same thing. I talked about this earlier at some point, but I can tell between the three of them by facial expressions most of the time. I couldn't explain how I can tell the difference unless I had you there looking at her with me while it happened, their expressions are just different in a way I can tell. The way the three of them act otherwise is still different enough that you can tell sometimes. Her doctors/therapist indicated that this isn't out of the ordinary for DID cases.

Right now the game plan is to keep doing what we're doing and hope for the best. She's been making progress on both the anxiety/seizures side and the personalities side constantly, so until she plateaus I don't think anything as far as treatment will change unless she gets into some sort of group therapy as well (which hasn't happened yet because of insurance bs and driving distances).

I'm not sure what the typical cases are like because hers is the only case I'm familiar with as far as the timeline goes. At this point her therapist specifically has said that it seems like that might be as deep as it goes, but she wouldn't be super surprised if there was one or more that haven't surfaced yet.

The situation with the uncle is bull**** to say the least. Most of her extended family still doesn't even know it happened, though he's probably going to die of prostate cancer before too long. AFAIK, he still shows up to Christmas/Thanksgiving type stuff with no problems from other family members.

Michelle confronted her uncle in front of her parents and his wife once when she was in her mid-teens I think, somewhere from 13-15, I don't remember exactly. Her parents basically didn't back her up at all, and the uncle denied it and called her a liar, etc.

We're going to try to do the best we can with that, and I'm making her get her *** into some online classes this fall. Live classes aren't really an option right now because of driving distances and how rigid the timelines are for having things done, etc. As far as work goes, she was let go from her call center job because they said she couldn't perform her duties anymore, but then they denied her short-term disability from the same company saying she could perform her duties just fine. She's tried to get some other jobs, and have gotten quite a few interviews, but as soon as they hear about her situation they're uninterested in hiring her. Feels bad man.

Yes, and it's the biggest benefit ever to having to deal with something like this. She reacts similarly to when I proposed. Best **** ever in the history of cool ****.

I also get to tell her we have a black president over and over, which always gets a "holy ****" or similar action.

no Question OP. Just wanted to say that I have been reading (see: lurking) 2p2 for a loooong time, and this is by far the most fascinating thread I have ever read. Thanks for sharing, and I wish you guys the best. Don't listen to all the haters.


edit: PS. your girl is cute, props.

Do you have to get them separate birthday/anniversary/christmas gifts?

There is a legal duty, but it only applies to the medical provider. There is nothing at all illegal about the patient, friends, or family disclosing what happened in therapy.

Yeah hipa for the therapist lol im dumb but that's obv irrelevant to op

Thanks, Spoon.

If I may, what are the objectives of therapy in a situation like Michelle's? The don't really seem to be attempting to suppress the personalities, nor do they seem to be trying to tease out any new ones. Why does she go?

wow this is one of the best threads ive read on here, keep it going baby!

I've had this in a much much much smaller scale cause a girl I dated last year had some serious mental issues due to molestation when she was young. She was extremely self-destructive at times also, and crazy mood swings (no not like all women have) beyond anything. Also weird as hell with sex.

Seems like you are a good guy and I hope this gets where you want it

No babies, and yes I am planning on it at some point. Until then I'll just skeet in her faces I guess.

I have to get into my side of things a little to explain this. When this started, she lost her job and her insurance. My bills went way up, and my ability to play the hours I was playing at poker and to play as well as I was went down. As a result, I was bleeding money and quickly went from making more than my parents and her parents combined to being lucky if I could FPP Pro it.

So we moved into my parents' spare bedroom (which also worked b/c my dad had lost his job and I was going to help them with bills). Michelle's dad is legitimately unable to work after 5 heart attacks and a stroke, so he doesn't work. This means he has a lot more free time to drive an hour each way to her many doctors appointments, keep an eye on her 24/7, and things of that nature, which frees me up to do the things I need to do. I simply have no one else to turn to for that level of crap that needs to be done. I hate it a lot, but I'm convinced it's my best play right now.

For what it's worth, after they got chewed out, they've done a lot better job taking care of her. So maybe there's some guilt for them working in our favor or something, or maybe they've decided to act responsible for once.

Yeah I know. I've thought about that before, and I made that decision at the same time I made the decision to stay with her to begin with. I talked about this earlier, but there are things that could happen that would make me leave, but that's not one of them, but thank you for the concern.

Nice name yo.

I'm not sure. All of them except Matilda seemed to have some idea of recent events, and all of them including Matilda knew about what had happened in her childhood. There have been things that each of them did not remember in recent events too (when they first emerged), so it's kind of hard to tell. Now they seem to all be up to speed most of the time.

Little Michelle and Rebecca #2 have problems with fine motor skills, but the rest of them seem to be equally skilled in everything physically. As for mental skills, they seem to have the same skill set, but each of them seem to handle themselves differently when going about solving problems in terms of their general demeanor, but I guess that's just like how they act differently any other time.

See my answer to Lottery Larry's question above. It's never been in terms of "if she's not better by ________", but always in terms of "if it gets so bad that ________."

Instead of answering this specific set of questions (since I'm not sure if I'm supposed to), I'll recount something that happened outside of therapy that might satisfy the same curiosity.

After Rebecca first calmed down (after the Wal-Mart dressing room incident), Michelle/Little Michelle/Rebecca collectively decided that Rebecca should speak to her therapist and tell things from her point of view. So there I am with Rebecca in the car on the way to the therapist, and Rebecca breaks down crying afraid that her therapist is going to think she's weird. We get there, I give a pep talk, and she goes back. Since then, she'd never tried to hurt herself as Rebecca that I'm aware of.

Before all of this started, I tricked her into agreeing to let me plan the wedding if we ever had one. **** a wedding cake, we're having wedding pizza. Additionally I've considering getting a lesbian friend of mine to be my best man just to piss off her family. We aren't getting married for a while, but how she'll handle it has definitely been heavy on my mind every time I've thought about the hypothetical wedding scenarios. I don't want to give away what I'm thinking about for a wedding in case I actually end up doing it because I want it to be a surprise (she's following this thread), but it takes everything into consideration.

It's weird that a lot of people seem to be getting the impression the OP isn't happy in this relationship right now. He seems happy to me.

(slightly unrelated)I would guess on some level he doesn't want her or is scared to have her fully recover.

I really liked the question at the end of page 3 (Michaelson) about what happens if one of the personalities fundamentally disagrees with something important about your relationship or her life, what happens then?(doesn't want to get married, wants to see other people, only wants to sleep with girls, wants to break up, wants to start going to church etc etc.)