Open Side Menu Go to the Top
Register
Girlfriend wants attention Girlfriend wants attention

05-06-2017 , 05:17 AM
Only poker.
But people come to me to ask about things like the above often so I've seen this a million times.
Sometimes I get someone upset about it and telling me I have no idea of what I'm talking about like you did.

Like always, I'm rooting for you to be right as OP seems like a hard working nice guy.
Unfortunately as you Americans say "at the end of the day reality wins".

It's true he should make more time for her like everyone said but the root of the problem is age and being bored of the relationship.

It appears that he will make more time for her this summer. I believe that is the correct step.
If that fixes things, then you are right.
If spending more time with her makes him her realize "I'd rather be playing poker or working out or be at school than spend time with her" we'd have to count as me being right.
Won't debate further, hopefully OP updates us on how it went after summer ends and hope you are right. :-)
GL OP
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 04:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by denks
I'm more interested how you can get a solid training routine done in 30 minutes. Unpossible unless it's some weird functional muscle confusion nonsense.

As for girlfriend, come on, playing a card game for pennies is a far higher priority. Think of all the womenz that would be impressed when you buy them a cheeseburger with your winnings.

Edit: As a semi serious response to the OP, I work full time, study, play poker a decent amount of time, work out (more than this half hour girly man stuff) and still have plenty of time. Plan out when you're going to play and when you're going to have time off and stick to it. Poker isn't going to go away if you miss a day.
Depends on what working out. If it's not body building you get can a very good high intensity session done in that time.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 04:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheeprustler
Depends on what working out. If it's not body building you get can a very good high intensity session done in that time.
It is bodybuilding routine. Usually about 10 exercise with 3-5 sets for each
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 04:22 PM
People telling him that he'll be happier without his gf is seriously lol. He may be and he may not be. People are more important than a game.

It may be worth breaking up with her for a while to see how life is without her and if you feel like that's what works for your life right now. If you do love her you will find out pretty quickly life sucks without her and you will be more motivated to go back to your relationship and give her proper attention.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 05:03 PM
This has nothing to do with poker. You aren't spending much time with her (understandably from your point of view.) So the only time she has access to you is when you're sitting at your computer. Make sense? And obviously she can only complain when you're around to hear, right? Poker is just a coincidence. Frankly, you don't need a girlfriend right now. Find some little bootie call (easier said than done), otherwise go stag for now.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 05:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
It is bodybuilding routine. Usually about 10 exercise with 3-5 sets for each
10? That be a lot of separate movements for one day!
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 05:34 PM
I really appreciate all the feedback. Here's the action I took to be a better boyfriend and prioritize my time.

We hadn't really had any big fights about this (yet) but all the non troll feedback opened my eyes to realize I'm just as big if not a bigger part of the problem. I should be grateful she wants to spend time with me, and I really do love her.

When she got home from work last night I was already off the computer and done with poker (booked a win) so I'd be ready to give her a hug and greet her at the door. I sat her down and said I didn't feel like I was spending enough time with her since I was playing poker or gone all day, but that has to change. I bought a big wall calendar and suggested we both right our schedules on it so I can make sure we have time together first and time for gym/poker/other hobbies second. She seemed really happy and it looks like everything will work out. basically I will play poker when she's working and we will start working out together in addition to just hanging out. I will try to remember to update when summer is over
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-06-2017 , 05:41 PM
OK well tbh I didn't catch the L word on the first time reading, so I guess that changes things a bit. It looks like you'll have a little more time this summer, hopefully you can figure it out by the time your schedule ramps up again in the fall.

I can tell you from experience that when you're in someone's sight, like on a computer or in front of a TV, it seems like you're lazier and ignoring them more than if you were off somewhere else doing something. So, schedule more poker time when she's not in the house, and go workout, etc, when she is in the house.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 03:25 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
She understands I am trying to play poker and make something of it
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
It's really frustrating for me when I'm in the bedroom at my station trying to grind out and she keeps coming in every 5-10 minutes asking me when I'm coming out and all this stuff. Like, I'm trying to build something for our future, but she is more concerned about RIGHT NOW.
tbh in your pg&c, where you're playing the smallest of stakes, jumping between formats and talking about depositing to play higher stakes because you want to 'roll the dice', and wanting to not track your losses in some cases (massive red flag). I'd say you're certainly not putting the effort in you'd need to even have a small chance of 'making something of it', even with the limited time you have available

like, it's a fine hobby, and you should still make time for your hobbies, but treat it as that tbh, not as 'building something for our future'
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 05:27 AM
The above poster touches on smth that I noticed as well but the topic was about the gf so I didn't mention it.

It's not a big deal if you are lying to others(on purpose or not) but always be honest with yourself.
We all agreed that you put your gf outside of top 3 in your priorities lately.
Answer to yourself why that was. Could be bc of being bored with the relationship already. If so, how bored are you gonna be 2 years from now? You're thinking about "our future". How bored are you gonna be in 10 years then?
Could be some other reason, give yourself the truth.
If unsure, explore further and spend more time with her like you plan to now.
Then ask yourself the question again after you have more data.

On another note, is poker a hobby, a tiny addiction or a profession I am serious about doing?
Again, no need to answer those to us, just be aware yourself of what the truth is.

Also, it helps in general to chat with people who are older than you. See what they regret about doing early on in their life, see what they are happy with doing.
I won't spoil the answers, but you'll notice patterns.

Most of the time the patterns that they seem to regret are exactly the ones you plan to take yourself.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 07:41 AM
Quote:
It's not a big deal if you are lying to others(on purpose or not) but always be honest with yourself.
Now's there something I don't experience everyday. A sentence that I totally agree with and totally disagree with at the same time .

Lying to yourself = stupido

Habitually lying to others = equally stupido (and not something a Real Man - or Woman - does).
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 09:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bloobird
tbh in your pg&c, where you're playing the smallest of stakes, jumping between formats and talking about depositing to play higher stakes because you want to 'roll the dice', and wanting to not track your losses in some cases (massive red flag). I'd say you're certainly not putting the effort in you'd need to even have a small chance of 'making something of it', even with the limited time you have available

like, it's a fine hobby, and you should still make time for your hobbies, but treat it as that tbh, not as 'building something for our future'
Yeah after all the feedback I realized I had my priorities out of whack and poker is not number one but my girlfriend is. I'll be playing in my free time when she isn't home so I can spend more time with her when she is.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 04:18 PM
OP you seem to have found a good solution with that calendar thing.
Make sure you stick to the time limits for your poker playing time that you promised your girlfriend.
And playing in a place other than your home could also be a good idea (you really don't need a classy chair to win, do you?).

Commit to your poker studies (make sure you clear out those red flags others mentioned about your approach to poker) and keep track of your progress.

Share that progress with your girlfriend, "I was doing this much per hour, now I make this... I'm improving but I have to do better, to get better I will do this and that. I'm grateful for your support! "

Also draw out an image of the future with her and poker. "Poker will enable us to buy this, or take a vacation there...".

And finally, be honest with yourself:
"If I can't win consistently at this limit for this amount of time/hands, I will know that I'm not cut out for this, and I will do something more fruitful with my time."
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 04:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by PokeRock
Also draw out an image of the future with her and poker. "Poker will enable us to buy this, or take a vacation there...".
I strongly recommend not doing this, it can resonate very badly with some people. Talking from own experience here.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 04:43 PM
Alright so in addition to the advice with my lady, I will track all play whether shot taking or whatever. Do guys think that playing different game types is bad? I mean I have more fun switching it up every day, even though I know to be the best at a certain type you typically only play that type. Some days I just feel like plo, some days I feel like nl, and some days I just want to play SNGs. I'm definitely winning the most at SNGs but I mostly care about having fun and making profit. So if those are both met that's what I'm gonna do
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 07:20 PM
Play for fun, you're not paying the bills with it.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 07:47 PM
Being disciplined enough to plan out your social life in advance instead of being spontaneous shows that you may have the maturity and discipline to do well in poker.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 07:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
It is bodybuilding routine. Usually about 10 exercise with 3-5 sets for each
WTF? In 30 minutes? If your degree is going to be in Exercise Science you either need to pay more attention or find a new school.

Also, poker is not going to work out. Your girlfriend might. Pay more attention to her to find out.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-07-2017 , 10:24 PM
Someone making a detailed, honest post about their personal life, followed by a hailstorm of criticism for using the word 'I' too much... pretty funny.

OP, sounds like you ought to upgrade your subordinate. Give her a care basket or whatever and start-up the hiring process!
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-08-2017 , 12:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didace
WTF? In 30 minutes? If your degree is going to be in Exercise Science you either need to pay more attention or find a new school.

Also, poker is not going to work out. Your girlfriend might. Pay more attention to her to find out.
I'm not doing it in 30 minutes. Somebody recommended I do 30 min. Workouts to save time. Thanks for your great feedback dude. You might want to go back to English and learn how to find context clues since we're so open about giving advice
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-08-2017 , 12:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tuma
Someone making a detailed, honest post about their personal life, followed by a hailstorm of criticism for using the word 'I' too much... pretty funny.

OP, sounds like you ought to upgrade your subordinate. Give her a care basket or whatever and start-up the hiring process!

Appreciate it. What do you mean by give her a care basket?
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-08-2017 , 07:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
It seems like everytime I sit down to play a session, she gets upset with me that I'm not giving her attention or spending time with her. I live a busy life as a full time student and work 30hrs a week at a crap job, and when I come home I workout for 1.5 hours.
For the guy telling me I'm stupid for doing bodybuilding in 30 minutes, I clearly stated in the first post I workout 1.5 hours a day
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-08-2017 , 09:41 PM
They always say they get it, but they never do...
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-09-2017 , 06:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OilSpill
For the guy telling me I'm stupid for doing bodybuilding in 30 minutes, I clearly stated in the first post I workout 1.5 hours a day
What exercises are you doing? Presumably building muscle?

I don't understand how you get in enough food + rest, while you're a full time student (40 hours a week + assignments), work 30 hours a week, grind poker, work out 1.5 hours a day and have a gf. Something isn't adding up.
Girlfriend wants attention Quote
05-09-2017 , 11:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MultiTabling
What exercises are you doing? Presumably building muscle?

I don't understand how you get in enough food + rest, while you're a full time student (40 hours a week + assignments), work 30 hours a week, grind poker, work out 1.5 hours a day and have a gf. Something isn't adding up.
Full time student just means you take 12 or more credits per semester, so I was in class for 3-5 hours depending on the day, I'd go work 6 hours after school, come home and go straight to the gym and then play poker after that. I was pretty busy all week, no doubt there.

As far as food and rest is concerned, I eat 2100 calories per day (I weigh 230lbs and am 6'2") or more if I did cardio. Sleep was borderline with usually 6 hours per night, more on rest days.

For workouts I had a 3 day split with one day off at the end and then do it again so 6 workouts a week. Normally I do a push/pull/legs or chest/arms, back and shoulders, legs.

Just as an example, for chest/arms I would do the following:
5 sets of 10-12 slight incline dumbbell bench press
4 sets of 8-10 machine flat bench press
3 sets of 12 -15 reps of cable flies
3 sets of 10-12 tricep pushdowns
3 sets of 10-12 single arm reverse grip tricep extensions
3 sets of 8-10 alternating dumbbell curls
Quadruple dropset finisher of 10 reps each single arm db. Hammer curls

On days I work I would eat 650 calories before work, have 300 on break, and 700 when I get home for dinner. I'd have a whey shake after each workout (~250 calories)
Girlfriend wants attention Quote

      
m