Tom Dwan - the missing man - Page 12 - Poker News

ever since he was a young boy
he played the 5 card draw
from jersey down to vegas
he used to beat them all
but now nobody sees him
in any casino halls

that crazy degen LAG kid
somehow managed to lose it all!

he raises like a madman
becomes table captain quick
squeezing 40 percent
bets every river brick
double floating nits
the TAGs run and crawl

that crazy degen LAG kid
somehow managed to lose it all!

hes a no limit wizard
there has to be a twist
a no limit wizard,
got such a loose raising wrist

how do you think he does it? (i dont know!)
what makes him so good?

aint got no respect for money
cant ever lay down a hand
dont care how tight you are
wins every pot he can
just sighs and rolls his eyes
hates to just check/call

that crazy degen LAG kid
somehow managed to lose it all!

i thought i was the local hold em king
but i just handed my circuit ring to him

even in those easy spots
he puts you to the test
his brain wont let him fold
his raising arm does the rest
but now hes in big debt
triads got him by the balls

that crazy degen LAG kid
somehow managed to lose it all

props. used all my entire attention span on it and can't read others now.

edit : loooooooooooool @ that video. mc short bus

Last edited by Barry Champlain; 07-31-2015 at 03:32 AM. Reason: video

Quote

07-31-2015 , 03:32 AM

#277

n3v3r f0lds

newbie

Join Date: Jun 2015 Posts: 21

Quote:

Originally Posted by veract

LMAO One of the best things ive ever heard!

Quote

07-31-2015 , 04:59 AM

#278

tultfill

veteran

Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 2,926

Sounds like someone with an IQ over 80 managed to write something mildly funnyclever and then paid an Argentinian bum 5 $ to sing it for him.

Quote

07-31-2015 , 05:05 AM

#279

golfbum983

old hand

Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 1,943

that video.....lolz

Quote

07-31-2015 , 05:18 AM

#280

LOLCh1pPorn

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Nov 2012 Posts: 4,580

wow that's some level 7 dwanage right there

Quote

07-31-2015 , 09:21 AM

#281

DarkMattersMan

adept

Join Date: Feb 2015 Posts: 960

LOL I WONT BACK DWAN. Best chorus ever

Quote

07-31-2015 , 11:23 AM

#282

wheelflush

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,381

Perfect!

Ok almost perfect!

Quote

07-31-2015 , 12:02 PM

#283

joshua6666

adept

Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 1,028

If you're having roll problems,
I feel bad for you, son
I've got 99 millions,
but I won't back Dwan

Quote

07-31-2015 , 06:55 PM

#284

WuhOh

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 388

This about sums it up on how all the hands went...

Last edited by WuhOh; 07-31-2015 at 07:02 PM.

Quote

07-31-2015 , 08:32 PM

#285

veract

grinder

Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 550

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elvis_Costello

So so good

Quote:

Originally Posted by fml95

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberShark93

nice

Quote:

Originally Posted by baudib1

speechless

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnMyBike

Omfg I can't stop laughing

Quote:

Originally Posted by epcfast

You just won the internet.

Quote:

Originally Posted by n3v3r f0lds

LMAO One of the best things ive ever heard!

Quote:

Originally Posted by golfbum983

that video.....lolz

Thanks

Quote:

Originally Posted by DarkMattersMan

LOL I WONT BACK DWAN. Best chorus ever

My only contribution to wheelflush awesome lyrics

Quote:

Originally Posted by poofinger

Such a beautiful voice and singing LOL as a word, perfect.

You really made me LOL

Quote:

Originally Posted by SrslySirius

MY SIDES

???

Quote:

Originally Posted by wheelflush

Perfect!

Ok almost perfect!

Well, I tried my best to do justice to your song. Sorry for the crappy voice

Quote

07-31-2015 , 10:36 PM

#286

OnMyBike

adept

Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 815

don't worry, "sides hurt" = "sides hurt from laughing"

Quote

07-31-2015 , 11:45 PM

#287

wheelflush

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,381

Quote:

Originally Posted by veract

Well, I tried my best to do justice to your song. Sorry for the crappy voice

It's ok. You got Tom Petty singing backup and the subtitles too. The visual effects are awesome.

Quote

08-01-2015 , 07:33 PM

#288

AKingdom

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,520

Quote:

Originally Posted by CuriousBystander

As I walk through Macau I inhale a deep breath,
I take a look at my bankroll and realize there's nothing left,
Cause I've been barrelling and losing so long,
that even my backer thinks that my mind is gone,
but I crossed Jungleman because he deserved it,
me be played like a punk? you know that's unheard of,
You better watch how you're playing, and what you're laying,
or you and your homies might be going broke,
I really hate to trip but I gotta tweek,
as they choke, I see myself in the crack smoke, fool,
I'm the kinda player that the trolls wanna be like,
on my knees in the night giving head so I can eat right

Been spending most my life, living in the triad's paradise...

Ha ha ha. Awesome remake of Coolio's remake of Stevie Wonder's Pastime Paradise.

Quote

08-02-2015 , 01:57 PM

#289

SpursDynasty

grinder

Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 610

dwan has been doing great with his acting role in Mr Robot tbh..

Quote

08-02-2015 , 09:50 PM

#290

WuhOh

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 388

HE IS ALIVE !!!!!!!!!!!!

OUT OF THE BASEMENT !!!

Quote

08-02-2015 , 10:02 PM

#291

ACG2x

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 2,083

Quote:

Originally Posted by WuhOh

HE IS ALIVE !!!!!!!!!!!!

OUT OF THE BASEMENT !!!

Obv just to the left of him in that pic is the triad with a gun saying "smile and act natural..."

Last edited by ACG2x; 08-02-2015 at 10:24 PM. Reason: Need to get my Asian gangs right...

Quote

08-02-2015 , 10:25 PM

#292

WuhOh

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 388

Quote:

Originally Posted by ACG2x

Obv just to the left of him in that pic is the triad with a gun saying "smile and act natural..."

looks like this girl has a knife held next to his balls

Quote

08-02-2015 , 10:26 PM

#293

WuhOh

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 388

Quote

08-02-2015 , 10:28 PM

#294

WuhOh

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 388

" Why Timmy Dean not in basement making fake iPhones? Back to the basement! NOW !!!

Quote

08-03-2015 , 03:34 PM

#295

Drrr.Gonzo

old hand

Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 1,586

The gimp suit has been robbing his skin of vitamin D lol

Quote

08-03-2015 , 04:21 PM

#296

skudroc

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 2,051

Quote:

Originally Posted by WuhOh

the xanax.... soooooo *** awesome !!!!1

Quote

08-03-2015 , 04:22 PM

#297

skudroc

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 2,051

Quote:

Originally Posted by WuhOh

the xanax... soo fckn exhausting !!!!1

Quote

08-03-2015 , 06:36 PM

#298

OFA

old hand

Join Date: Mar 2013 Posts: 1,917

That video... Holy **** that should get a whole section of 2+2 to itself

Quote

08-03-2015 , 07:06 PM

#299

TheMurderShow

banned

Join Date: Dec 2012 Posts: 355

Was this video made by a Brazilian?? While hearing it I just wanted to fall face first on a nail and end my suffering. I just witnessed the English language systematically and slowly verbally massacred ..was he eating peanut butter while singing? Put the pb down sir.
Still ..it's a decent video , won the Internet? Dunno about that, that title is still with risitas imo.

Quote

08-03-2015 , 10:47 PM

#300

tokeweed

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 2,966

Quote:

Originally Posted by WuhOh

I wouldn't be surpised if he's smoking meth.

Don't judge, you have to try it to know it. It'll make you say.. "Why the hell isn't everyone smoking this ****!"

Yes, it's that good.

Quote

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