Every time the guy calls he sings the Stevie Wonder song
"I just call to say I love you"

Stupid poker jokes that I still love:

1.) When someone tells a bad beat story about a limit hold-em hand: "You should have bet more."

2.) When someone knocks their chips over: "That's a bet!"

Poker conversation I alway hate: anything related to the bad beat jackpot.

will be stealing this one, ty

What a bunch of whiny-arses itt. These comments lighten the mood, keep everybody in a chipper mood. Don't like it? Put your headphones back on.

Edit: Except "Winner! Winner! Chicken dinner!" I swear, one day I'm going to the big house for a long time over that statement.

My friend was early in a tournament and flopped the nuts (ace high flush) with AQ hearts. He got called all in by AQ of spades. When asked why he called for his tournament life, he replied "I was calling for runner runner runner flush."

"I neeeeeed two pair, I neeeeeed two pair so IIIIIIII can get to stompin in my Air Force Ones."

I use most of these jokes in every session I play.

ok i'm guilty of using a few. My favorite is saying "oooohhhhhh a rainbow flop" when trips flop ala AdAcAh board.

Being a limit player I also like to play on the gamble aspect of the game. When the pot is 5 bets 6 ways I will often adress the dealer by name and sincerely ask them to "Pick me please".

Sometimes when I win with a crazy hand I like to say "theres no bad cards, just bad flops turns and rivers". I hope people actually believe these things when I say them lol.

^winner, winner, chicken dinner. (sorry bulls horn)

Now this is actually funny.

Does he do the same thing with red queens and a female dealer of Native American descent?

lol...an oldy but goody

The worst on all of this is that I sometime hear myself muttering the very same tired jokes that cause me to roll my eyes when others say them.

It's like bad beat stories. Nobody likes to hear them, yet sometimes can't help ourselves from telling them. Oh, but when we tell jokes they're funny... just like our bad beat stories are much different than the zillion other times someone got in ahead and then lost.

...and to combine these two thoughts. The person I referenced earlier about making a joke about what he shouldn't have folded on every single flop ALSO likes to tell bad beat stories. I just smile and nod. One time I tried telling him I had one, too. He got very interested, so I told him that I went in with the best hand, and then the other player caught up to beat me. He got very curious, and asked me what were the hands?!?

this would be kinda funny and weird..lol

most native americans dont refer to themselves as "red people." of course, if we had any native american dealers, i would probably make the joke anyway. i am on friendly terms with almost all of the dealers at my casino. the only people ive ever seen get offended by non-offensive racial humor are uptight suburban white people.