There is an imbalance when you get angry You don't act on those emotions why?

I've kinda read through some of your posts on other threads... and I know you think you tell it like it is and there is nothing wrong with that.. I understand. I've been in the same state... Lyrics come to mind.. and I thought "THATS THE WAY TO BE"... here ya go

"It hurts but I never show, this pain you'll never know
If only you could see just how lonely and how cold
And frostbit I've become, my back's against the wall
When push comes to shove I just stand up and scream '**** 'em all! '
Man it feels like these walls are closin' in
This roof is cavin' in, but it's time to raise it then
Your days are numbered like pages
And my book of rhymes got them crookin' boy
This crooked mind of mine got them all shook
And scared to look in my eyes
I stole that ****in' clock, I took the time
And I came up from behind and pretty much snuck up
And butt ****ed this game up
Better be careful when you bring my name up
**** this fame, that ain't what I came to claim
But the game ain't gonna be the same on the day that I leave it
But I swear one way or another I'm a make these ****in' haters believe it
I swear to God, won't spare the rod
I'm a man of my word, so your ****in' heads better nod
Or I'm a **** around in this bitch and roast everybody
Sleep on me that pillow is where your head'll lie
Permanently bitch, it's beddy bye
This world is my Easter egg, yeah prepare to die
My head is swole, my confidence is up
This stage is my pedestal, I'm unstoppable
Incredible hulk you're trapped in my medicine bowl
I could run circles around you so fast your ****in head'll spin, dawg
I split your cabbage and your lettuce and olives"

I mean I like the lyrics.. the guy is an amazing lyricist if you ask me.. one of the best if not the best... but in reality that's not way to live man.. hatred will consume you.. it's not good for you.. it's not good for your health.. and it's not good for anyone else... an eye for an eye is sometimes understandable.. but if u really sit down and calm down... dude.. high road makes you look so much better.. at the end of the day people may absolutely deserve what your telling them.. but does it really make you a better person.. it helps no one.. and really makes you look like your out of control.... we all been there one time or another but I hope you find some inner peace and you will never find it in money... you've been hurt a lot and screwed by people you trusted... but don't stoop to their level.. take the high road.. you will be happier and a better person for it in the long run.... gl dude... I only hope the best for everyone anymore.. and I can tell you it gives you a lot more inner peace for yourself as well...

I hear you. I really need to get off 2+2 and let you guys be. I can see my posts are negative I'm sorry about that.

hey we've all been in a state that wasn't healthy... don't take it personal... just try to reason with yourself and think it all through.. in the end you can only get what you give.. remember that and you'll go far no need to leave 2+2 .. its really a healthy community on the whole.. and you can be a part of it too.. i'm no saint, i'm no preacher.. no ones perfect.. just ask my wife ... just find that inner peace... everyone struggles from time to time. just try to pick them up instead of curb stomping them when they are down

I have a few days off work but I didn't plan anything my first day off and I spent all night watching Maury till 4 in the morning I haven't seen that time in ages. Next day I didn't get up until 2.30 not because I was tired but because I didn't want to.

It feels like I'm just hanging around waiting for death to knock on my door.

Sorry to hear that... do you have insurance? A dr. that you can see? You may be interested in going and letting a dr. know whats going on. if you wanna pm or talk on skype just drop me a line dude.. no one should have to feel that way..

I do have life insurance.

Everytime I go to the docs. and explain my problems they either cant help or dont want to help they just throw drugs at me, drugs that dont work.

Its not about drugs, its about the fact that I find life unenjoyable and dissatisfying. I detest every waking moment.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The only difference for me is I dont expect anything (or I dont expect anything to change), I just do the same thing over and over and over again.

I have a PS3 but I got bored with that real quick. I used to play poker, but I am not very good at it because I am just a nit playing scared money.

I tried to write a screen play but couldnt come with a plot or characters or anything.

I go to the gym a lot.

The honest answer is I dont have any hobbies, due to lack of money I guess. It would be amazing to travel the world, buy a boat, buy a big house etc...maybe take 3 or 4 years off work.

I tried Twitter but I only have 4 followers (LOL at me) I just it now for a gym log or stuff I eat but thats boring.

ask to be referred to a different dr. or a therapist/psychiatrist etc... if the dr isn't doing it for you try somewhere else... if meds aren't doing it.. therapy my help.. I know.. you may feel like a freaking nut ball... I do when I walk in there.. but people have tons of problems and deal with them on there own... making their families lifes worth.. being less of a man/woman.... so don't take shame in that... your being a man by taking the right steps...

the world we live in now.. especially from a mans standpoint is suck it up.. tough it up.. deal with it... the world we live in now is pretty ruthless and people say deal with it... in my opinion this world for the most part cares less about anything but themselves and thats the freaking problem.. if everyone gave a damn for one another this world would be much better off.. so don't fall into the stigma of every day culture... hoping the best for you.. if your down realize u need to take steps to change it.. if thats what you want to do anyway...

I dont care what people think of me. I went to talk therapy but they just told me to on with things, work more etc...

Its hard for me to find places outside of work. I went to this other place where i met this recovering alcoholic was there and a person who was in car cash and this other old dude. What a waste of time ...

do you like animals? maybe getting a pet might be an idea

Yeah maybe get a gold fish

I guess my point is when I don't have a lot of money I can't enjoy life.

Life grinds away at you, until your grounded down to nothing, then nothing matters.