Well, first, I don't think you're controlling, just asking for a reasonable marriage.
I'm unmarried so hardly the person to give advice for this specific situation, but good for you for setting clear boundaries and sticking to them. Counseling is a good step (was it yesterday?) and I applaud you for insisting on it.
At some point he's got to decide whether poker is a subordinate means to an end or whether it means more to him than his marriage. Much of the advice ITT is lousy because it presumes that bad marriage + money = good marriage. I've never seen it work that way. Setting a structure for him to step back and realize that he probably doesn't really want to sacrifice his marriage is your best strategy; I'm glad you're doing that.
I
do think a few people can play full-time professionally and have a reasonable work/life balance. However, his total lack of self-control worries me. In a way I'm surprised he's a long-term winner without more discipline, although I suppose a lot of big consistent winners are horribly undisciplined in other areas of their lives.
Quote:
Originally Posted by yogapantsandcoffee
He points out how much money we are missing out on, we argue....
This is a common theme with poker, where it focuses you on the value of time. I see this in my own life--I'm pursuing an academic career, largely because I think I have more to offer the world that way than as an eventual mid-stakes poker pro*, but I constantly ask myself, "Is that extra evening spent thinking about my dissertation worth the $20/hour or whatever that it's costing me?"
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*Eventually, if I dedicated more time to it, not now.