I've talked about this **** before. And I don't really know what I'm looking for here. May be I'm just looking/hoping for some like minded person to help me deal with whatever it is that makes me act like this.

This isn't a brag even though I imagine a lot of you will think it is.

I hate losing - everyone hates losing. But I hate it so much that I'm unable to play in games that are more appropriate for my bankroll.

I play a $40 fixed buy-in no limit game. And they take $4/hand off the table. I know how debilitating this fee is to my win rate. I think conventional knowledge suggests this game is not beatable in the long run. So, I should play a bigger game.

But losing 4 buy-ins ($160) is like a dagger to my heart. And posters here are always saying things like "lol stack sizes". Yup, that's the game I play in.

Here's the catch. I work 10 hours/week and my disposable income is $3500/month. I have 0 debt. And yes, losing $160, is a big problem for the health of my mind.

So, why am I not playing the $300 fixed buy-in no limit game? WTF is my problem? How do you guys deal with the losses? How do you build the confidence that random luck will take care of itself and in the long run you'll be in the black?

I ****ing hate it! But the $40 is the only game I can bring myself to play. My casino has these games - They're all fixed buy-in:

$40 1/2
$100 2/3
$300 3/5
$1000 5/10

Food is free when playing $300 and above.

wtf if It's 4$/hand then 400$/100 hands?

10bi goes to rake? This can't be right

Hawaiian Gardens Casino in Cali. $40 fixed buy-in 1/2. No flop - $1 drop no JP drop. Flop = $3 drop + .50 JP drop. Turn or River = $4 drop + .50 JP drop.

No Joke ... but what a joke, right?

4$ a HAND IS CRAZY.
I mean poker is about making rational decisions and not decisions based on your feelings.

You don't really have a choice man. Play higher or lose forever. That game is disgustingly unbeatable. Plus the free food is +EV man.

You just have to build up your mental fortitude. It's not perfect, but it improves over time. I used to hate when I'd lose like $40 in a session. Now it takes losses of $500+ in a session for me to feel it. Especially when your next levels double the amount you lose per game (50-100, 100-200 etc). You just gotta get yourself a fat bankroll, and trust in your game plan. If not, you seem like you're bleeding rake at the low stakes game. Might not even be worth to keep playing.