As I said in my OP, my résumé sucks. My degree is really the only thing of any worth on there but luckily the whole idea of the résumé is changing. The standard "education, past jobs, and extracurriculars" just doesn't cut it anymore. Maybe in certain fields this standard still applies but for someone like me, who wants to get into new, untapped fields, I've got to be different.
For example, lets say I made parody accounts on Twitter that obtained millions of followers. This would be valuable in the sense that I can produce something that gains the attention of so many people and I would certainly highlight that on a résumé.
Or maybe I worked with a brand and produced some type of awesome real time marketing ad. The best example I can think of was Buffalo Wild Wings earlier this year. Remember the
overtime commercials? I think it was during March Madness this year when one of the games just ended regulation in a tie (and was about to go into OT) when the first commercial to pop up was BWW essentially saying "this OT is brought to you by us". It was fantastic. If anyone can think of a better example I'm all ears but I don't think anything has topped that.
Anyways being able to say that "I was responsible for such and such content" is my idea of a résumé.
It also sort of shocks me that when applying to companies, there aren't initial tests/quizzes used to weed out people, and it's mostly just submitting résumés. I feel like at the very least some sort of Wonderlic should be used, but maybe that's just me