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Old 06-11-2017, 01:42 PM   #1676
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

There is always humor in any situation.

My sister reserved a room at a fairly ritzy hotel for me. She will be coming back soon so we will both be staying there.

My suitcase and other bags are at a friends, but I had a backpack with a day or two worth of clothes because I knew I would be staying with Dad. One of the caretakers brought me dinner, which I hadn't eaten, so I had a plastic bag with dinner. I also grabbed a tupperware container with some of Dad's valuables since we have some residents here that like to "collect" things. I stopped at a convenience store on the way to the hotel to get a bottle of wine, because I needed a bottle of wine.

So, I walk into the hotel with a backpack with a bottle of wine sticking out of it, a plastic bag with a meal, and a tupperware container. I was quite disheveled after going through this and all I had on were shorts and a t-shirt. I really looked like a homeless guy.

There was a young guy working the counter, I'd say in his 20s. He said hello, followed by "what brings you to Austin". Every time someone has asked me something like this since I arrived, I always immediately think "well, my dad is dying". But, of course I don't say that. I don't know if it was a combination of being worn out and at that point just thinking "**** it", but it came out. And, I didn't just say "well, my father passed away". I said "I just watched my father die". The look on his face. I assured him it was ok, but it definitely rattled him.

He gave me the key and I went up to the room. I walked in and it wasn't a room. It was a deluxe suite. I'm guessing one of their deluxest suites. It overlooked the lake and downtown. All I could think of was, damn sis, you didn't have to do that. I called her later and she didn't know anything about it so I'm sort of wondering if the kid at the desk did that for me?

The suite has an adjoining room on each side, but both doors were locked. I went back down to tell him and he said he would send someone up.

Meanwhile, I was starving. There were various things packed in the backpack and I was not in a tidy mood so I just dumped everything on the floor. I grabbed the bottle of wine and the food and set it on the table. However, I did not have any utensils or napkins. So I improvised. The dinner was a BBQ plate. I took the top off of the little plastic container with the BBQ sauce on it and used it for a makeshift spoon. It was more fingers than spoon and between that and eating the brisket I was making quite a mess of my hands. Since the bedroom was locked, I had no towels so I just grabbed a sock that was on the floor and used it for a napkin. About that time, the lady had come to unlock the bedroom door and she popped her head in to see me in all my dining splendor.

I'm sure everyone that works there is talking about that homeless guy in 1404.
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Old 06-11-2017, 08:52 PM   #1677
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I found it interesting reading about your father's last days. Thank you for posting about it.
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:13 PM   #1678
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

With the help of Dad's caretakers, we cleaned out his room. So much stuff. He never threw anything away.

If you have read this blog, you'll remember that I be already gone through this exercise when we moved him out of his house.

I got there first and just started tossing things out. Mom got there not much longer. She didn't want to throw out anything. She even kept a box full of old old almost empty rolls of duct tape, because, well you just never know. So, we put it all in boxes.

We got to Mom's house and started unloading the boxes, but upon seeing this she decided she didn't want all the stuff in her house. Grrrrrr.....

But we didn't have anywhere to put it so she didn't have much of a choice.

More on Dad's stuff later.
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:17 PM   #1679
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I went to the funeral home this morning. It is really a crematorium. The guy that picked up Dad's body told me to go there today, but they weren't ready for me at all.

They need a signature from a doctor and some other administrative stuff, so she said it would be a few days before we get the death certificate, and a few more days after that to get the ashes.
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:26 PM   #1680
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

When I emptied Dad's house, we put a lot of stuff in a pod. We are going to empty it tomorrow, but I went out there today to try to get a feel for what was in there. It has been a while and I wasn't sure.

I got the address and headed out. Google maps took me to a shopping center.

I called pods and the guy put me on hold for a while before coming back to tell me Google maps said it was in a shopping center. Then, he said it was across the street. I told him there was a movie theater there, which he confirmed by Google street view.

He put me on hold for a while and found out where it really was. Nowhere close.

The pod was about half full. About 80 percent books. The rest is art and art supplies and some misc stuff.

I came back and rented a storage unit by Mom's. She wants to have an estate sale but I suspect it will just sit there.
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Old 06-13-2017, 06:24 PM   #1681
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

So
Many
Books......

Mom came through and arranged for a couple of guys to help empty the pod. They made quick work of it. We got it unloaded and reloaded into a storage unit by Mom's house before noon.

My sister and I then began going through each one to make sure dad hadn't stored money it anything in them. The second reason for doing this is he had a lot if books autographed by the author so we wanted to separate those.

Dad had pretty eclectic tastes in books. Most are art books, but after that the subject matter is pretty random.

We got tired so we stopped to take some stuff over to Mom's. She informed us that there were even more books in her she'd that needed to go. It's like the books are reproducing or something.

Eventually I think we got them all in, but we still have a lot to sift through.

So.... Many..... Books....
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Old 06-13-2017, 06:27 PM   #1682
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

My dad kept a military foot locker with him, always locked, as long as I've known him. We have always wondered what was in there. Mom has always thought it was porn.

We got the guys at the pod place to cut the lock.

Mom was right.

It was stuffed full of porn.
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Old 06-14-2017, 04:25 PM   #1683
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Books, books, books...

We finished going through everything, including the books.

After throwing away even more stuff, we have it all down to books, records/CDs, and Dad's art.

We will sell the books and records.

My mom wants to have an in memorium art exhibit. She has always been pissed that dad wasn't recognized more widely for his work. My sister and I agree with it is really more about her than my dad, but if she wants to do that it's fine.

After that we will split up his art. We are donating some as well.
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Old 06-15-2017, 06:54 PM   #1684
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

My sister and I went through a few large crates of pictures and scrapbooks this morning. My grandfather saved a lot of this sort of thing and dad kept them.

It was pretty interesting. Lots of pics from the 20s through the 50s.

My grandfather was a fairly accomplished violinist and later a youth symphony conducter so he had tons of newspaper clippings and playbills (ugh, can't think of the right word). We tossed a lot of it because the paper was falling apart and the pics were not holding up well. But we saved a buttload of it too.

I took a few items and had them shipped home.
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Old 06-15-2017, 07:02 PM   #1685
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Mom had a sort of mini breakdown this morning. There is just so much going on and it's hard for her to process everything.

She started worrying about her own health and how we would be able to deal with her if she couldn't handle things.

She's been dealing with all dad's stuff and wanted to make sure we could handle stuff now if it became necessary.

We were able to get in to see her lawyer on short notice.

He talked about different was to set up things (i.e. trust, etc.)

Mom already has my sister as medical power of attorney but there is a different flavor power of attorney (can't remember anything right now). We set up my sister and I and one of my mom's close friends to do this.

I think there are other things we need to do like allow me to access her bank accounts, but we'll deal with that later.
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Old 06-15-2017, 07:05 PM   #1686
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Forgot to mention, the lawyer is $300 hr. 😲
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Old 06-15-2017, 08:12 PM   #1687
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I want to go home.
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Old 06-15-2017, 08:13 PM   #1688
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Maybe he's available to help out with your next house remodel.
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Old 06-16-2017, 07:21 PM   #1689
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

What do you need to do immediately? I assume that all things with funeral are regulated by the hospice? Right?
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Old 06-16-2017, 07:35 PM   #1690
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

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What do you need to do immediately? I assume that all things with funeral are regulated by the hospice? Right?
I really don't have anything to do. We are waiting on the death certificates to take care of various things.

The only reason we went to the lawyer was because mom was sort of freaking out about stuff.
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Old 07-26-2017, 08:58 AM   #1691
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I'm sort of neglecting this blog.

Several reasons - life change, nothing interesting to post about, general 2p2 posting burnout.

As for the third, I've just never adjusted to the forum world. It's so hard for me to understand how people communicate here. I just don't get trolling. I guess I get that there are people out there that would do this. They exist in the real world too. But what I don't understand is why the community/forum allows and even promotes it. It has a blatantly obvious detrimental effect on the forum. Just one really bad poster can ruin a forum.

At any rate, I've sort of stopped posting everywhere except in the lounge. I really like the movie thread and the lounge is pretty troll free in general.

Enough about that.

I do have updates and even if it is probably not interesting to anyone, I use this blog to mark events and to sort of chronicle my state of mind. I often go back to find things that I posted or just to see where I was at some point in the past.
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:04 AM   #1692
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I am in a really good place right now. I never thought this would be possible. I just love where I live. St. Petersburg is really nice and just being around the water is life changing for me. My job (more on this later) is still a combination of Dilbert and Office Space but I'm able to deal with it much better now.

But the biggest thing is my new significant other. She's awesome. It took me about 3 dates to know she was the one. I always cringed when people said this because I've always thought that I would have to get to know someone for a long period of time before I was sure. I am sort of thinking that I've dated enough women to now know what I want. I'm not really sure why I have this feeling now but never had before.

But, back to her. She's just great. She moved in about a month after our first date and it has been great. I couldn't be more happy.

And........she likes to fish! Woot!
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:12 AM   #1693
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

FWIW I am very against trolling and work behind the scenes even though it hasn't shown any results yet.

Glad to hear that you're doing well with the girlfriend!
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:24 AM   #1694
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

A couple of Dad things.

He named me executor of his estate. Apparently some things can't be finalized until I do something. I'm not sure what, though. Mom hasn't said she can't get to his accounts or anything.

The lawyer sent me several forms and informed me that I must show up in person at the county courthouse (in Texas) at some predetermined time. I'm not sure what else I have to do but I'm hoping most of it can be done electronically.

Also, Dad named me a beneficiary of a life insurance policy. It is quite a lot. My jaw dropped when I saw it. I'm not sure at all what to do with it. It's big enough that I am now trying to figure out how to retire early. More on this later.

Mom has done nothing with the books or his art that is in storage. I can't blame her too much. Not only is she old and there is a lot of Dad stuff to deal with, but she fell and broke her arm. She's pretty incapacitated. I might need to deal with this myself.
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:40 AM   #1695
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Work...

One one hand I really don't have much to complain about. My bosses treat me quite well and the work itself isn't all that difficult. But it is just constant headbangdesk work. I've been able to blow it off most of the time but occasionally it rises to a level of stupidity I can't ignore.

As I mentioned before, I got a sizeable check from Dad's life insurance policy. Before this happened, I had been working through scenarios on how to retire early. I've saved quite a bit in my 401ks and I "think" between those and this windfall I can make enough to get by.

I'm not eligible for social security yet. I can draw when I'm 62 (I'm almost 60 now) but at a reduced rate. My hope was that I could hold out until 66 to get a more robust payment but if I can swing it now I might go for 62. I also get a small pension from the state when I'm 65.

Until I draw those, I would either have to live on the income from the investments which is significantly less than what I make now. Or, draw income and withdraw principal which is scary. My other option is to take a part time job. I'm seriously considering this. 3 days a week would be a good compromise between full retirement and what I have now. However, any part time job would pay soooooo much less than what I make now, and it would be difficult to find a part time job that provides health insurance.

My plan right now is to work on a plan that makes me comfortable. I will most likely work until next March. My current 401k will be fully vested and March is when bonuses are paid.

I have a lot of decisions to make. I've worked hard towards retirement and now I'm sort of scared of it.
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:50 AM   #1696
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

One more probably non-anything.

I posted this in the H&F forum. I've been losing weight for the last 6-9 months. I'm not really sure why. There are so many possible contributing factors.

GF cooks everything now so my eating habits have changed. My breakfasts and lunches are exactly the same but dinner is a bit different. Before gf I generally ate either a salad or some cut of meat with canned veggies. She makes pretty much the same but we eat fresh veggies instead. I feel like I"m eating more than before. I used to find myself waking up at night starving so I would eat some nuts or some lunch meat or eggs or something (lean) so I could get back to sleep. I never do that now.

But, I started losing weight before I met her.

I'm also sleeping well now which I haven't in the past. And, my emotional state is much better as well. Contributing factors?

My weightlifting strength has declined somewhat but not an alarming amount. I would think that a combination of getting leaner and age would contribute as much as anything.

I feel great. I'm never tired. I still do my same exercise routines.

But, I continue to lose weight. I weigh less than I have in decades. None of my pants or belts fit anymore. It's funny because I've wanted to get rid of my spare tire fat forever and now that it's gone, I'm a bit concerned.

I had a complete physical with bloodwork in March. Not only did they not find anything, he drew a smiley face on my results. But, I've lost even more weight since then. I have an appointment with the doctor Friday.
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Old 07-26-2017, 09:51 AM   #1697
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Quote:
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FWIW I am very against trolling and work behind the scenes even though it hasn't shown any results yet.

Glad to hear that you're doing well with the girlfriend!
Thanks!

Yeah, I know it's a sticky situation. Where is the line? Who knows.
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Old 07-26-2017, 10:06 AM   #1698
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

I think I've mentioned it, but I've been working with an illustrator on one of my children's books.

Since it is a series with recurring characters, we have taken some time to get the characters down. We've gone back and forth on a few but I think we finally have finished products.

She has created a rough sketch storyboard for the book we decided to start on and we are meeting today to go over it. I have yet to meet her so this will be good. It's pretty convenient that she lives near me.

I feel pretty positive about this. I don't have any thoughts that it will be financially successful. There's a gazillion children's books out there and I think you have to be extremely lucky to get noticed.

It's more just something that I want to do.
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Old 07-26-2017, 04:26 PM   #1699
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

Everyone at work complains about our processes. Not only do we have too many, none of them really work.

Management is listening! They just implemented a new process team to review our processes, along with a new process the new process team will be using.

Gotta love it.
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Old 07-26-2017, 04:49 PM   #1700
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Re: biggerboat's building boondoggle blog

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Thanks!

Yeah, I know it's a sticky situation. Where is the line? Who knows.
Sometimes you don't know where exactly is the line. But you know for sure if someone is far far over it.

I am not against funny light-hearted trolling.... But that was not the case.

And with weight...... May be just chemical balance of hormones.... Did you change your smoking habits? But most important, I think, you are doing: check with your doc.
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