I instantly know you are a fish when: - Page 7 - Mortar and Brick -- Two Plus Two Poker Forums

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I instantly know you are a fish when:

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11-13-2013 , 08:23 PM

#151

As2s3s4s5s

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 2,212

Can't we assume both?

Sent from my SCH-I545 using 2+2 Forums

11-13-2013 , 09:45 PM

#152

LeoTrollstoy

banned

Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 1,122

You manually count out pot sized bets playing a no limit game.

11-24-2013 , 05:08 PM

#153

Sebastes Pinneger

adept

Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 721

Over-Tipping is a dead give away.

11-25-2013 , 12:40 AM

#154

Acesflow11

adept

Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 908

picks up cards to look at them when dealt to them....

talks after hands trying too justify terrible logic on bad play just made lol...

11-25-2013 , 12:43 AM

#155

Acesflow11

adept

Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 908

Quote:

Originally Posted by Playbig2000

so who is the fish UTG or UTG+1?

Spoiler:

they are both fish get it right

11-27-2013 , 03:39 AM

#156

Teamsecretagent

newbie

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 20

So the next time I go to a poker room I'm going to wear poker gear, bring all my money in 20's, maybe some 1's and 10's, bring an additional card protector, and stack all my chips in stacks of 10.

Anything else I missed to try and fit in? I will also pay a female friend to sit behind me while I play.

11-27-2013 , 01:35 PM

#157

pfapfap

HP JoY 2011 wienerbucket

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 22,537

You can do all the tricks you want, but a serious poker player knows how to handle chips and protect his cards without slowing down the game. You can't hide those things.

11-27-2013 , 04:08 PM

#158

callipygian

slowrolled by tpiranha!

Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 19,880

You can try to hide those things but that just generates a reverse tell when it becomes obvious.

"Oh, is this (game)? I was looking for (smaller game). Actually, it's fine, I'll just play here. How much is the buyin? Do I need to post?"

True n00bs try to appear more experienced than they are, they pretend to have played bigger, not smaller. They try to buy in too small and then buy in for the min, not ask and then buy the max. They assume that posting rules are universal; asking is a sign you've played in multiple casinos and realize rules vary.

11-27-2013 , 07:46 PM

#159

Teamsecretagent

newbie

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 20

Don't worry. I'm gonna head over to Bay or M8trix next week and try to blend in with the fish. I'm gonna brag about all the big games I play and then buy in for below the min (accidentally) haha lol.

11-28-2013 , 03:14 AM

#160

WickedChippa

temp-banned

Join Date: Mar 2013 Posts: 437

I make fish move overbet pot on

872 rainbow flop.

He folds and says: You got Ace King huh.

Slam down 63 diamonds and say pshawwwww.

Then I wonder.

11-28-2013 , 04:02 AM

#161

matt57225

adept

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 749

Quote:

Originally Posted by PokerDharma

When you clapcheck.

lol

11-29-2013 , 03:06 PM

#162

EJXD2

grinder

Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 568

Quote:

Originally Posted by steamraise

You keep your chips in stacks of ten.

Dang, I do this... I like to get ten stacks of ten and make it look like a nice bowling set up.

11-29-2013 , 04:38 PM

#163

FreeAsTheBird

journeyman

Join Date: Jun 2013 Posts: 208

Hmm I do most of this stuff listed but...

I'm pretty sure the average person thinks: oh, young kid with hoody, must be crazy, must call down!

Except 40 stacks are a must after a long day of whale crushing.

Btw, anyone that buys into any game with all $5 chips? Seriously, who wants to start with so many chips when you get loads of those $5's cause everyone buys in with those damn reds! Even at 2/5!

You're not a fish when you buy in with 8 greens and a black and table change 4 times + per night at 1/2? Then walk around in between hands starring at each table!

11-29-2013 , 06:42 PM

#164

46&2

banned

Join Date: Sep 2012 Posts: 1,074

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sebastes Pinneger

Over-Tipping is a dead give away.

I disagree. I happen to tip "above average" and it has nothing to do with my playing ability... I promise.

Quote:

Originally Posted by pfapfap

You can do all the tricks you want, but a serious poker player knows how to handle chips and protect his cards without slowing down the game. You can't hide those things.

Agreed

11-29-2013 , 09:16 PM

#165

TheBritishLion

grinder

Join Date: Feb 2013 Posts: 617

I just know.

11-29-2013 , 09:54 PM

#166

EJXD2

grinder

Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 568

Quote:

Originally Posted by SetSetter

I'm sure a lot of these got mentioned but....

*players who ask about the bad beat

*players who joke with each new dealer about dealing the bad beat

I do both of these on purpose to appear fishy/there to gamb00l.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SetSetter

*players who get openly giddy about any potential flop or board that would allow for a bad beat.

I draw the line here.

12-02-2013 , 05:00 PM

#167

TxRedMan

O8Blessed

Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 6,256

you explain your reasoning for playing a hand to the people who didnt ask or care

you throw your cards at the dealer as if they have something to do with it

and finally "new setup!"

12-02-2013 , 11:41 PM

#168

orb_dam_u

old hand

Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 1,351

.. when you think you can somehow instanly know I am a fish...

12-03-2013 , 06:55 PM

#169

MasonJercier

centurion

Join Date: May 2013 Posts: 156

Quote:

Originally Posted by pfapfap

I spend more time at poker tables than you do, and I see more tables per session than you do. I'm not sure why you insist on discounting my (and others') personal experience. This is not some grand conspiracy being pushed by anybody, this is my own personal observation.

usually when someone tells you this, that makes them a fish.

12-03-2013 , 11:22 PM

#170

pfapfap

HP JoY 2011 wienerbucket

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 22,537

I'm a dealer. Of course I'm a fish. Nine white shirts and an empty seat.

12-04-2013 , 04:49 AM

#171

phunkphish

veteran

Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 2,902

Quote:

Originally Posted by callipygian

You can try to hide those things but that just generates a reverse tell when it becomes obvious.

"Oh, is this (game)? I was looking for (smaller game). Actually, it's fine, I'll just play here. How much is the buyin? Do I need to post?"

True n00bs try to appear more experienced than they are, they pretend to have played bigger, not smaller. They try to buy in too small and then buy in for the min, not ask and then buy the max. They assume that posting rules are universal; asking is a sign you've played in multiple casinos and realize rules vary.

This reminds me of the first time I tried playing mixed games in Las Vegas.

I was looking for a low-limit mixed game, but the only thing I could find was the 15-30 Mix at Aria. I decide, Why not, I'll give it a try

"What are you guys playing? How much is the min buy? Ok, I'll buy in for that much. Do I need to post?"

First game is Omaha8. Good, I've played this game before (online, for play money). First hand, I 4bet AA5x preflop, and end up scooping the pot. I continue to crush the O8 rotation. I'm running as hot as the sun, and my face is beaming to match.

Next game is Badeucey. I have no fricking clue what this game is. I am familiar with the HORSE family of mixed games; I've read up on Triple Draw -- this one, it sounded like a game somebody made up while drunk in a home game.

"What is this game? How do you play?" I ask with doe-eyed innocence. It's met with complete silence. "No, really, what is this game? I've never heard of it"

One player at the table finally decides to speak up. "You know how to play. Stop pretending, shut up, and just play your cards."

"WTF" I think to myself. All the previous elation and joy that had been building up just vanishes; it transforms instead into a hot boiling rage. I instantly rack up my chips, and deliver a snarling -- and very satisfying -- speech at the players before leaving:

"I've never played this ****ing game. I haven't even heard of this ****ing game, but I was willing to learn this ****ing game and give you ****ers my ****ing money. But you ****ers won't even tell me how to ****ing play, because you're too ****ing stupid. So **** you."

I did later learn how to play Badugi and its variations. Just not on that night.

12-04-2013 , 10:44 AM

#172

donkatruck

old hand

Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 1,911

Quote:

Originally Posted by phunkphish

This reminds me of the first time I tried playing mixed games in Las Vegas.

I was looking for a low-limit mixed game, but the only thing I could find was the 15-30 Mix at Aria. I decide, Why not, I'll give it a try

"What are you guys playing? How much is the min buy? Ok, I'll buy in for that much. Do I need to post?"

First game is Omaha8. Good, I've played this game before (online, for play money). First hand, I 4bet AA5x preflop, and end up scooping the pot. I continue to crush the O8 rotation. I'm running as hot as the sun, and my face is beaming to match.

Next game is Badeucey. I have no fricking clue what this game is. I am familiar with the HORSE family of mixed games; I've read up on Triple Draw -- this one, it sounded like a game somebody made up while drunk in a home game.

"What is this game? How do you play?" I ask with doe-eyed innocence. It's met with complete silence. "No, really, what is this game? I've never heard of it"

One player at the table finally decides to speak up. "You know how to play. Stop pretending, shut up, and just play your cards."

"WTF" I think to myself. All the previous elation and joy that had been building up just vanishes; it transforms instead into a hot boiling rage. I instantly rack up my chips, and deliver a snarling -- and very satisfying -- speech at the players before leaving:

"I've never played this ****ing game. I haven't even heard of this ****ing game, but I was willing to learn this ****ing game and give you ****ers my ****ing money. But you ****ers won't even tell me how to ****ing play, because you're too ****ing stupid. So **** you."