The client that I am working at right now has a nazi for a DBA. I am creating reports for them in Reporting Services which means I have to write stored procedures to get data from their database. No code gets into the system without being scrutinized by the nazi and it is absolute torture. Within 10 minutes of checking in a piece of code he shows up at my desk for an "official code review", which is basically him just saying "what's this? what's this? why you do this?" in English I can barely understand. I've gotten so fed up with it that the last time he came by I just answered "i don't know" to every question he asked of me.

The worst part of his code reviews is that there is ALWAYS something wrong with the code in his mind. I'll check in a stored proc and he'll find like 2 places that I could have been more efficient. If I fix them and check it in, he finds another couple of issues with them. I had to talk to his manager yesterday and ask him to keep him away from me so I could actually focus on my job.

I'm glad this is just a contract, because I'd probably end in a fist-fight with the guy if I worked here full-time.

I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I would be grateful to have someone scrutinizing my work a little.

I go through this massive clusterf*ck change management procedure every time I release some code to make sure everything is up to scratch. Needs approval from my line of management, the line of management of the client, line of management of the deployment team and a final tick from the overriding change management department.

The thing is that no one actually checks the validity of the code. The closest it gets is the client doing a basic functional test... Everyone else that gives approval just cares that the paperwork (which I complete myself and can and frequently do write anything in) has been filled out.

Oh and before anyone asks, yes, government ldo.

Reasonable code review is nice, it often spots issues that you can't see because yourself. Insane code review like that is somebody power tripping like a douche.

The DBA at my old job hadn't learned new technology since 2001. He refused to let us use Subversion, because it was a security risk ("OMG ANYBODY CAN CHANGE YOUR CODE"). He didn't upgrade to MySQL 5 because it was too much work. He refused to allow us to use Stored Procedures because - wait for it - they were a security risk. He much preferred that we hand code all SQL and apply our in-house data sanitization routine - which amounted to mysql_real_escape_string, but done recursively so we could pass arrays.

Yeah, there is a big spectrum between Spottswoode and 00Snitch. Since I'm working on an associated program and not the main line product code, I'm much closer to 00Snitch's position. We are looking to improve it all testing is engineering testing (me test things before I check it in). There is some code review with the other guy on the program, but it isn't a formal process.

I agree with this, and I was actually quite happy to have someone reviewing my code when I started here, as it's probably the first job I have had where someone does this.

But when it comes to things like the following examples, it gets really annoying.

{t-sql}
Declare @tempVariable int
select @tempvariable = (Select count(0) from some table)

"WHY YOU USE SELECT, USE SET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

or
Declare @GroupingType nvarchar(64) --SMK:16 is enough

These lines of code have passed 6 code reviews, but suddenly they are an issue since my last check-in.

Here's a little more about this guy. One day after submitting code, I got in my car and drove to s-bucks for a coffee. When I got back, he was standing in the kitchen (you enter the building through a door near the kitchen) WAITING FOR ME. It blew my mind, he must have stood there for 15 minutes waiting for me to return so he could chew me out over some t-sql. I spoke to someone in QA about it, and he said that he has actually taken people outside to lambaste them over the quality of their work. This guy would probably be fired from most professional work environments.

Wow. This guys manager really needs to explain to him what is acceptable and not. The guy in my department with a reputation of being a big stickler and hard ass would never stakeout someone waiting to talk to them.

The hard ass did send an email to another guy in the office about having a check-in message that was wider than 80 characters. Yes, you read that correctly, not code, check-in message.

This.

I would even like some kind of informal review as mentioned by someone else, but the problem in my team is that we tend to employ people who are experts in the field who have picked up a bit of programming on the way rather than people such as myself who are first programmers but actually pretty noob with the subject matter.

So if I've ever got a problem with subject related matter, I've got heaps of people to ask, but if I want to bounce some programming or design ideas around I'm a bit limited.

Yeah. I openly acknowledge that I know very little about networking despite being in the "Advanced Networking" department.

I think spottswoode's DBA needed something to do. Guy is a little too anal.

As far as code review, show me the explain plan -- we run Oracle, if it looks decent its allowed.
One thing I am a stickler for is using bind variables. For what we do, 99.8% of code is repetitive.

wow you guys have to deal with some real ******s. I was going to tell some stories about dealing with 3rd parties, but they're nowhere near as bad as, say, the nazi DBA.


Is it me, or do nazi DBAs always have faces that remind you of a well-slapped arse? (red and blotchy)

jesus christ get that guy a time-machine set for the early 90s.

Evil DBA sounds like he came from a company like where I work. DB performance is so important we have a standards doc that reads like a lawyer wrote it. I would be pissed if someone was standing over me all day doing that though especially the SET/SELECT crap there's no difference. If I deploy something and it times out its one me I'd rather take responsibility for my own screwups that be micromanaged.

Is there any interest in a C# or MS SQL Server thread?

If you haven't already done this, definitely go right ahead. We could start off with a general Microsoft .Net platform development thread and then if it gets bonkers split it up.

My company is 100% .net based, so I'm sure I'll chime in there.

this new programming forum should be removed

its just another thing to waste my time on instead of actual coding and getting stuff done

Same could be said for the whole of 2+2

"If only I could have all those hours of random browsing back..."

Juk

sweetness a new forum. maybe this forum will motivate me to get back into programming. i saw so much potential for solving poker problems.

Can we rename this thread to make out more clearly the programming low content thread please?

how about the hackers trycatch?

Or the exception handler thread?

Along the same lines, UnhandledExceptionEventHandler thread. Anything that does get covered by the other threads goes in here.

It is also ans awesome name because it is there to handle exceptions that are not handled. But if there is an exception that is handled by this handler, it would not be an unhandled exception.

lol awesome

haha, I was just changing it to something like: catch("LOW CONTENT" > /dev/null)

Saw _dave_ already changed it based on the above suggestion, so I'll leave it, I like the UnhandledException idea better, maybe we can rotate it between ideas.

Ahhh thata much easier to spot, ta

both imo. I think the ms sql server one would be particularly good for me, I know quite a few tricks about writing ****-off-a-shovel-fast sprocs.

LOL. This reminds me of my last dev job. They eventually implemented a style guide that blacklisted certain types of variable declarations and/or loops. It was unbelievable.

I have to get this out of my system. Every time I read that 'select/set' thing, I have to resist the urge to say 'but there's a good reason to use SET instead of SELECT...'


I'll get my coat...