I've told my brother, haven't told my parents, no desire or need to unless i bring home a long-term boyfriend

As part of the heterosexual community can I point out that we aren't a community. In fact I'd be quite surprised if anyone I know thinks sexuality is always black and white. I don't know why you'd expect it to be any other way.

For what it's worth, the only time anyone has told me they are gay is the only time I've found the situation slightly awkward. It was just that it was done in terms of an announcement and could I keep it between ourselves. It may have been a big issue for him, I'm not sure, but it certainly felt like my reaction was in the spotlight. Trouble was I couldn't have cared less except for the fact I didn't really want to be in a position of knowing something everyone else didn't and thereby get caught up in the low level deceit.

All the times I've found out someone is gay as part of a conversation have been not at all weird but rather on a level with finding out they have a degree or failed their driving test or whatever.

In the US at least, I have seen a few 16-year olds shed a few tears when they failed their test while I stand in line for renewals or w/e, so it's still a big deal to some. And I think that's what is troublesome about the whole issue, 95-99% of people aren't going to make a huge deal out of it. But if you still care deeply about the few percent that may, then it isn't so obvious to come out, imo.

I'm 30

I couldn't really see myself telling my family. My mother would be fine, but my brother and father I couldn't tell or have know. They're both kinda homophobes so ...

Some people though I believe think I'm gay because of some of the clothes and bracelets I wear.

.. idk I'm just sort of trying to figure out what to do about my friends. My one friend that I've told is totally cool about it, and it's certainly nice being able to be open with a friend of mine about that stuff. But idk about my others ...

I've never been with a guy unfortunately

That is unfortunate.

If ever you are with a guy, you'll find out why.

US Olympic female soccer player comes out

Are you in school or working with people your age? That's a good source of friends that you don't really need to figure out where to meet. Or do you do any activities? I have some friends that I only really know from playing soccer, and I pretty much only see them there, though I have occasionally seen them in other contexts. Poker friends even? Presumably you're on this site because you play poker.

So my one friend told my other friend I'm bi. He said it was no big deal. idk quite how to feel about that. I kinda wish he wouldn't cause maybe I should have told him, but on the other hand I kinda almost feel like it's a new day imo.

All RMC's posts are gone!

Did she get perma baned or something??

Good catch.

I would hope the answer is: -RMC- requested all posts be deleted.

Especially since they let posts of "banned" members that are acceptable to stay on the forum.

Fair point.

But...

Why on earth would she do this?

Banned members are often "allowed" back, but usually only if they fly under the radar, at least for a good amount of time, to establish that they intend to post and play by the rules and have turned over a new leaf.

Owning up to being a previously banned account, especially within days/weeks of starting the new account, is generally a bad idea. The original banning mod has the right to (and sometimes does) reban them if they find them.

I don't know if that's what happened, but I do know that she was OTBCed (one touch ban and cleared), given the message that appears where all her posts were. She might also have done something in another forum, that I don't know.

Concerning breanne/RMC, is anyone really surprised? How many accounts is that now?

I'm not sure how you should feel about that either. You have to figure there's going to be some talk about it here and there when you're not around, and he did at least go to you to let you know what was going on. But like you said, that was something you were supposed to do, not someone else.

Personally, I would love if all my friends found out I was gay without me having to tell them. That way, I wouldn't have to tell them. But that's not going to happen and in some ways it's wrong for it to go down like that.

Too many. I actually forgot RMC was breanne, whoops. Definitely unfortunate because she didn't **** all over this forum like she tended to do in the other forums.

+1 lol. i mean some of my friends know but not all, and not my parents :/ they won't really care but it still feels awkward to tell them

boomp

Well Lirva's bump may not have been successful, but I have another incident to add onto the situation described in my post partially quoted here.

I look younger than I really am (latest guess of my age I heard was 19 though I'm really 27), so 'Joe' asked the other day if it ever annoyed me that so many don't think I'm a doctor. I said something, then eventually I said that there was a time when someone would make a Doogie Howser joke once a week. blah blah blah...

And then, he says, "Yeah, that's gotta suck for you, right? He's a gay actor now."

I just ignored him and moved on with the conversation, but I was (somehow) surprised that he thought I'd really be bothered to be compared to a character based on the character being a very young doctor and me appearing to be a younger-than-I should-be doctor just because the character that played him is gay. Implying that all things Doogie are gay, I guess. And he's not a "gay actor now," he's an actor who happens to be gay, and was even back in 1989.

Joe's obviously an idiot over many things. Does he think Wayne Brady is gay too since he is Barney Stinson's gay brother? lol

So I'm trying to be comfortable looking like a *** in public imo. The other day I was at my friend's house and I was wearing some tripp pants with zip off legs that turn into shorts, and it was hot as **** so I zipped em off. We ended up going to the store for a blunt stick and some drinks and here I am with my girly blue ankle socks and shaved legs out in public at the local country folk convenient store in rural Oklahoma looking like a total ***. I was embarrassed and basically hiding behind my friend.

sucks

It's a slow process. You can't expect to be completely comfortable with a huge change in image that's inevitably going to attract attention; next time it won't be quite so embarassing, and eventually you'll be happy with the attention rather than nervous. I think it shows a lot of bravery to be doing so in rural Oklahoma.

It was kinda fun in a way, but not a whole lot. Kinda like ... I'm such an offense to these country folk, everything that is evil and wrong with America and such ... but mostly I was just uncomfortable.

My brother asked me, "do you feel safe going out like that?" I was wearing bright pink shorts and a baby blue tank. It made me giggle, and I guess I really hadn't thought about it. I used to be self-conscious, but over time, I just feel a lot more confident and proud.
(I live in the Midwest in a pretty standard town)

It really does get better and easier, as trite as that might sound.

thx guys

You should just wear in public what you feel like wearing. If you arn't comfortable wearing more flamboyant clothes, by no means should you do so.

My rule of thumb is: If what i'm wearing is appropriate for the occasion, i'll dress as flamboyantly as i feel like for the day, and don't care about what other people think (case in point being some of my wsop outfits).

FWIW: I wouldn't feel comfy in OK in really flamboyant clothes either...