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Sucks to hear that you cheated on your bf, i honestly feel it is 1 of the worst things you can do in a relationship (outside of like beating/etc). If you truly love him and respect him, you'll be honest with him and tell him what happened. It might end up hurting your relationship short run, but long run it will certainly make you a much stronger couple.
This is a tough one. Traditional morality tells us it's bad to cheat, but personally I'm not much on traditional morality. A lot of it goes against or base human nature, and that's often a bad thing more then it is a good thing.
It's our base human nature to want to ****, and to want to **** multiple people, not just the same one over and over again.
Despite me actually believing everything I just said, I am also a pretty big romantic at heart, and do believe in love.
I also would like to believe that love and sex can be seen through separate lenses and that ****ing somebody else doesn't have to mean you love your longer term partner any less. That way of thinking is probably asking too much of most human beings though.
As a piece of evidence, albiet ancticdotel, I will say that a good friend of mine has cheated on his bf more then once, with more then one other guy, yet I know for sure 100% that he cares very deeply for his bf and loves him a lot.
Despite that deep love and caring he has still cheated on him. Go figure right?
That's the thing people are complex, and relationships are complex. It's hard to say the same rules should apply to everyone in every relationship.
Personally I'd say, why don't we let J&Mgetbusy decide for himself what he can live with, and how he is going to handle his own relationships and sex life, and not go about judging him.
He's a big boy, I think he can figure it all out on his own.
Now if he had been asking for advice that would be a totally different story, but I certainly didn't get the impression that he was.