blah..couldnt cash out. had to verify account. got it done but lost like 300 in the process. arghh

ok busto..blah i'l be back sober!

Sorry to hear that, however this is.a.pretty good example of why you need brm.

yea discipline is a must in poker. just wanted to do one cashout then go own my own pace. Ended up playing 5/10 hu chasing. Happy about busting though. Seems like it had to happen inevitability for me to realize that discipline what I am lacking in Poker and life, not skill. Time for some serious withdrawal from everything. Create the will

p.s *** friends, they all turn evil...

Ok..back with a better state of mind..

Not going to post results as much anymore unless its a big score or cashout. Just reminds me of how low ive sunk and the need to play higher seems to come from that along with mj/alcohol. Staying sober this time around. Not sure how long, but definitively until it doesn't affect my roll.

Change of goals. Get enough money together to move abroad and get back on pokerstars. This should lead to original goal anyways.

Got my account verified. Redeposited 50. Cashed out 500 yday and waiting for it to come. Have to remind myself one step at a time or i'l never make it.

Deleted most of my phone book; hitting the gym consistently; Learned how to swim on my own which I thought I would never learn in life. Took me about two weeks and now I can do laps! =)

"I hope for Nothing. I fear Nothing. I am Free." - Nikos Kazantzakis

just saw this on 2p2 for first time and didn't want to forget.

got my first cashout in a long long time. Was only 500 bucks, but feels like a lot more.. =)

Time to redefine the grind.

quote: "I was a prisoner of my past, never again will I be self-imprisoned"

played a lot today.

played the 100k pretty poorly.

10rebuy 1st for 600+

Try and cash out again soon

solid results! keep it up

thanks yo..

couple scores:

$82 turbo 6th for 400
$82 turbo 2nd for 1200

current roll: 2k+

slower than i would like but cant bust this time to spare time. now should be faster, start on multiple sites.

gl at the tables!

didnt play alot until yesterday and today

7th in the 10k on bovada..argh..first was 2+ =(

$5rebuy turbo 1st for 570

current roll: still 2k+ no real progress. need to change that this coming week.

"no days off. its about gaining the competitive edge."

About the play the 100k on bovada along with the 300 punta cana seat..hopefully play well in both.


roll: 1.5k+; -500 life

wow your doing very well, any insights on your poker career? a story would be nice

thanks phil! i'l post story after i break 10k..it'd be too depressing right now since its still affecting me drastically roll wise.

So been putting in some mad hours the last couple days..
Sunday was brutal
300 punta cana hand
- flop kd Qd 8 i have 88 he bets pot, i flat. turn 10x he bets i shove..he shows 1010 vnh..

100k bovada
lose flip for 20k stack then very next hand still had like 7k left pick up aa
guy limps i shove, he calls with aq flop 10 j k. gg

monday
82 turbo - 7 people left ss shoves utg guy reshoves i shove kings vs a2 and a10 for cl...ace gets there..that one burned in the moment.

just right now finally took one down..unfortunately it seems rather small atm..

5rturbo 1/151 = 450

k so tired right now..been skipping the gym trying to make this spark faster..need to start going back asap.

need to stop focusing on money and just getting better each hand for the long term.

I no longer have my initial goal in mind. I realize I am not mentally tough anymore. Its going to take a while to get back to where I want to be and I want to finally face that reality.

ft sweat 4k bovada 50 4/7 currently. 1st is 1.2k but i cant afford to play for first which is upsetting..i have to focus on moving up in money and give up +ev spots which iam not sure is a mistake or not...advice on this would be helpful..

only solution i see right now is to save enough to where 1st place is less than 10% of roll or so.