You Are Alone With Your Vision
You would think that after coming off my best month in poker that I would be thrilled and proud of myself. That has not really been the case for me. I truly thought that by showing a family member my thread that it would be explanatory and helpful. Quite frankly, I have been disappointed with the outcome. It hurts to lack support from those closest to you, but at the same time, their outlook is sadly similar to the rest of society.
The two main issues with what I am doing are as follow:
1. leaving "unexplained" gaps on my resume
2. not adding any value to society
My philosophy to both are quite simple. I am currently a full time university student and I understand that a great number of students work while studying and they have an edge on me in that regard. It is tough to find a valid response to this, I may as well chalk it up as opportunity cost. Although, in terms of adding value to society, I feel that I can be more efficient with my time and effort now, and be more of an asset to society later on.
I honestly just cannot wrap my head around working a normal job while going to university when I can play poker and earn more money on my own schedule.
If you could do something that you genuinely enjoyed and were passionate about while receiving the same compensation as you would from your current employment, would you do it? The resounding answer would most certainly be yes. Frankly, it is not uncommon for people to take a pay cut to do another job that they enjoy more. What is odd is that I find myself on the other side of the spectrum. By playing poker, I am actually making more money than I would at a job that I would not enjoy as much. The reality of my situation is that I am not yet qualified to embark on a career that would provide true purpose. Although, I am in university and have prioritized it for that reason.
Honestly, most people are adamant that I am just gambling all day. From my perspective, everything in life might as well be a gamble.
"There are only two certainties in life - death and taxes" - Benjamin Franklin
So what the hell am do I really think I am doing? Maybe I just rationalize and justify it to myself when I truly believe that I am taking calculated risks. The facts are that I have not had a losing month in over a year. At this point, it cannot be all luck.
I mean what I find honestly hypocritical is that someone I had a lengthy discussion with claimed that gambling is forbidden in his religion. I remember saying you have a stock portfolio do you not? What the **** is the difference? There are no guarantees. In my opinion, the stock market is as much of a gamble as poker. Maybe the discrepancy lies with the stock market having societal respect. Any average person can get lucky and win in the market or at the poker table. In my opinion, the calculated risk is justified by consistently winning over a large sample.
I am not foolish enough to believe that I will be printing money playing poker forever. For that reason I am definitely not going out and blowing all of my money on hookers and blow. I am essentially utilizing poker to reach the next chapter in my life. It is merely a stepping stone that I enjoy in the present.
This may seem like a far fetched example, but I have a vision and a goal to essentially make 100k in order to invest in real estate and create a comfortable foundation for myself. What is honestly abysmal is that the majority of people will see a true visionary and call them crazy, yet when they succeed they will accredit a lot of their success to good fortune. Sadly, I do feel a parallel sentiment as I am being ostracized for working smarter and debatably harder than the norm. Although, the illusion is that I am sitting in my boxers clicking buttons like a monkey. It is extremely frustrating.
In a sense this feels similar to a rant, but the purpose of this thread is to look back and understand my thought process in the moment during this challenge. The sad reality is that at the end of the day, money talks, and once I achieve this ambitious goal, it will be frustrating to watch as opinions and perspectives change.
At this point, I must find my motivation from my own vision and truly believe in what I am trying to achieve.
Elliott