Got up early and went to see my prof. today and got some clarification on my paper. I then worked on it in the library for a few hours, which was productive. Eventually came home had some lunch and played a short sesh where I ran like **** and played probably B game. The very last game I essentially spewed in a spot I should not have, even though it can't be terrible. Snap quit my sesh and now I'm going to lift.

Well this week has been productive for me. Went to school everyday this week and handed in a paper in one of my classes. Now I have another one to write for next Tuesday and then preparation for finals begins. Therefore, I do not really know how much poker volume I will be putting in. Although, I am not very happy with how some of these sessions have been going. Originally, I was going to complain, but whining gets me no where. It is what it is, this is how the month looks so far and all i can do is work hard and turn it around.





Interesting thing ChicagoJoey said on his podcast was that people look at work as a negative thing, but it should be viewed as a positive. I could not agree more and admire that view point.

Well I have decided to write a post to reflect on poker and my challenge up to this point. Let me first start by saying that I created this thread with two main intentions. The first of my intentions was primarily to track my progress on this journey. Secondly, the majority of the people in my life do not know that I play poker and my family does not support it whatsoever. Honestly, I have attempted to explain it to them in the past and they just were not having it. With that said, I partly created this thread to in hopes of showing the non-supporters one day as a means of explanation.

As of late, there have been moments where I find myself thinking about my journey so far. Perhaps it is because Summer is swiftly approaching and the pressure to apply for a Summer job is looming over me. Last Summer, I worked multiple full-time jobs that consisted of manual labour and paid minimum wage. Long story short, I quit them both because I did not have an urgency to make money and strongly disliked those atmospheres. At the time, I would wake up at roughly 7am and go to work all day then come home and shower and grind HUSNGs at the 2.25s and 5s. Normally, I do not focus much on hourly rates, because I always try and focus solely on the poker itself. Although, back then, I would probably make 5$/h and that simply was not a justifiable reason to pursue poker rather than maintain employment. Eventually, Autumn came and I went back to university full-time and thus, created this thread to accompany my educational journey.

Now, looking at the bigger picture, since last update, I am roughly 8% of the way towards this goal and it has been roughly six months. Therefore, in terms of my ambitious goal, that is not very impressive. Although, comparable to what I would have made working a part-time job alongside my full-time schooling, it is nothing to gasp at. That is what I try to keep in mind.




In light of not being supported (except by very few) on my poker journey, I decided to take the approach of working hard in silence and letting the results speak for me. The more sessions that I played, the more that I realized that poker is one long grind. Therefore, constantly trying to update my thread and focus on the daily or weekly results was not conducive to mental strength. Instead, I decided on to focus on the important aspects that would lead to success.

• Putting in solid volume and adapting to each situation as it arose
• Making correct +EV plays, rather than focusing on results
• Maintaining a level head and refraining from tilt

As I continued to grind, I realized that it was difficult for me to discuss poker without complaining and whining. Therefore, I decided to stop talking about it unless it was with specific poker friends. People who do not understand poker do not care if you make the correct play, they only understand results. Frankly, many people who do play poker actually only understand results as well. Although, that is not how I have chosen to approach the game.




If I am being transparent and honest, I decided to write this post because poker has not been "fair" to me. I have been on a downswing and the grind has not been going my way. Although, this "unfairness" has led me to truly think about some aspects of this journey. For one thing, I knew what I was getting into when I started playing poker. Secondly, just because my EV line says I should make x, does not mean I am entitled to x. Thirdly, someone pointed out to me that regardless of my EV line, my actual results are very adequate and still lucrative enough to justify grinding. It is important to realize these concepts whether the grind is going my way or not.

Yesterday, I had my worst day playing poker in terms of results. It did not seem to affect my mood very much, but in the same vein, it was very thought provoking.

1. People in poker are constantly saying that poker is dead, there is no more money to be made and everyone should move on. To put it simply, that is just untrue. Poker is still more lucrative than many employments.

2. The concept of putting in work should be seen as a positive, rather than a negative. A person works towards their goal because it is good and desirable, not because it is bad and detrimental.

3. Quebec legislation is trying to ISP ban poker sites, and there is not much I can do about it. Therefore, my future in poker feels as though it is somewhat up in the air.

The approach that I have taken is that I need to adapt or die. Rather than worrying about what I cannot control, I just need to roll with the punches and take every day for what it is. If online poker is removed from my life tomorrow, I will be fine. There will be other interests in life that I can be passionate about.

Perhaps that is why I decided to start being healthier by eating cleaner and going to the gym consistently. Having an outlet in my life where I can put in hard work and be guaranteed "fair" results is very encouraging. For the most part, I always thought that would be the case in university. Although, I have found that if someone is not studying a field that has absolute answers, it is all up in the air. Therefore, two of the biggest priorities in my life are actually very uncertain in nature.

Finally, a major reason that my family does not agree with poker is because they do not see how it adds value to society. Quite frankly, I agree with them in that sense. Additionally, I face criticism that in the future, it will be difficult to explain gaps in my resume to potential employers. You know what, maybe they are right. Although, for the moment I rationalize it to myself as working smarter, not harder. Honestly, the alternative is working at some type of minimum wage job helping someone else achieve their dreams, rather than pursuing my own. I have already branched out and am trying to invest my money and learn about the financial world. Personally, poker is a means to an end for me, not a profession. So for now, all that I can do is take each day as it comes and roll with the punches.

Thanks for reading,

Elliott

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Very interesting read.

Wish you all the best that you do the right decisions concerning poker and outer job world.

I believe that it is no easy choice and that both has it pros and cons. Neither do i believe that poker is dead, nor that it is an easy road. Following has been said many times, but it is still same true as ever: "Poker is a hard way to make an easy living." For me this has not changed at all in recent times. There is still money to be made, but if this is the way to happiness depends all on the individual. There people that love the game soo much and it is what they want. Or people that value the individual freedom and responsibility first. And for them poker or having any other own business is the only way to happiness. But there are also lot of other people for which other things count like a regular and predictable salary, a job where they are part of some bigger community (may it be the actual project team or the company they work for) or like you say a work that has some inner meaning and contribute to society. So this is everyones own choice to be made. What i think is never a good way is to go for poker , because there is no other option in life to earn money for living and be satisfied with your work. How many people that have no other back up started threads with "I will study hard and earn x dollars a year" and vanish as fast as they come up here. OK, not much new that i said, it is what can be found in many internet articles if google for poker professional. Anyhow wanted to respond as i liked your sharing of thoughts and as it feels as if you are somehow at a cross road now. Good luck.

Thanks for the kind words and I appreciate your thoughtful insight. I would not say that I am at a crossroad, but my point was more so that I could be at any time and I will adapt accordingly and ultimately be fine.

Hard way to make an easy living is definitely accurate.

To each his own.

Last night I went out with friends and had some drinks. Ended up getting a water at the bar at one point because I just was not feeling it anymore. Today had soccer and ate pretty clean. In the midst of all of this I have been playing some poker here and there and all I can say is that I am doing my best. Probably will not be going out tonight as I have a paper to work on due Tuesday and I have not even started yet haha. Priorities...

Woke up today really wanted to put in a sesh and fire some MTTs...but have to work on my paper :/. Priorities.

Well today I really wanted to play poker but I refrained in order to work on my paper. I worked on my paper a decent amount, but honestly, not as much as I should have. I am going to have to finish it tomorrow because it is due Tuesday, should be fun haha.

Anyways, at one point I could no longer concentrate on my paper so I decided to go and watch some TV. Instead, I ended up playing a sesh. Long story short, hit some sun and ran well and made up for a huge portion of that ds I had been on. Crazy how much variance there is in HUSNGs. It still surprises me after playing loads of them.

Also watched WGCRider take down an MTT for 160k like a boss on twitch. Was ****ing epic. He ran some sick bluffs too, never seen someone be so cool and relaxed while winning 160k. Good stuff.

If you can make up in one session most of a "downswing" or "running bad" you don't really know what a downswing is or running bad.

GL else!

40bi not a ds?

Well, I went over the last 2 pages from post 126 onward, I don't see anything noteworthy. In post 152 you have something like a breakeven session (or 2 sessions) where you ran insanely hot above ev in the beginning then end up breaking even both in ev and in real money, basically the two lines converged. The ev dip in the end is something that can happen if you play regs (else should be extremely rare and should be a slight worry), but overall everything is really super standard.

TL;DR only thing that should slightly worry you there is the small dip in ev, absolutely nothing else is remotely noteworthy.

To be fair, before I read this post I was thinking about how readers can only go off what they are shown. So it is only natural that you have this insight. I cannot expect people to know what the actual case is without showing them. I have refrained from posting a majority of my graphs, which is why when I say ds or running badly, no one actually sees it. That is my fault. Eventually, I will post the overall graphs and those will speak volumes for themselves.

Sure, if you are skipping a lot, then yes, we can't have proper idea and you can be very well right in that case.

I honestly post very sporadically aside from my monthly update because I realize that poker is one long grind so my day to day results are not as important. When FTP/Stars merge, I will probably post my challenge graphs.

It has been a hectic week as I was up until 6am the other night finishing my paper. I got up a few hours later and went to class and handed it in. University life. With that said, next week are my finals so I will be on lockdown until those are out of the way.

I have been playing some poker here and there and am trying to just grind as best I can. The reality is that I play against a lot of regs and that is the nature of HUSNGs. It keeps my game sharp, but can be frustrating at times. Although, I would definitely attribute a lot of my learning process from playing and adapting against good players. That is a definite positive.

On another note, the NHL playoffs are starting which should be very entertaining and I am excited to enjoy that. Might be firing a series bet, still undecided.

Lastly, my health and fitness has been going well as the other day someone told me that I looked thinner. Out of curiosity, I stepped on the scale to discover I had dropped roughly 10-12 pounds. Pretty happy with that as I have been lifting, eating right, and doing cardio. Matter of fact, about to go hit the gym right now!

Decided to update on how my month is going since I need to buckle down and prepare for finals. Took the day off from school related work so that I could be fresh starting tomorrow. Not sure how much poker I will play until the 23rd, but I will leave my MTD graph here for now. Volume is meh, cause I have been busy with writing papers etc.

Realized how much preparation I actually need to do for finals and spent most of the day playing poker...not a great feeling. Although, I did do some cardio and went for a run because it was nice out and I was tilted from my sesh. With that said, I have decided to self-exclude myself until my finals are finished, so below is my gross mtd graph.





This break will be good for me, and hopefully when I come back, things will turn around and I will be refocused.

Just finished my last final for the semester and am free for Summer now! Have not played poker in roughly a week and am enjoying this break. Will be going out tonight to enjoy and watch some great playoff action.

Originally, I had decided to take the rest of the month off. Although, I realized that I was actually down on the month. It does not sit right with me ending the month down and having a losing month. Even though my EV is fine, I just do not like the idea of losing money on the month even though it was due to run bad and lack of volume. With that said, I think I will try and put in some solid volume in the next few days to try and squeak out a winning month.

This Friday-Sunday I will be out of town as a friend and I are going on a roady to visit our other buddy at his university, and I cannot wait! It is going to be unreal, full of debauchery . Anyways, with that said, I better pump out some volume these next few days!

Honestly, I am pretty glad that April is coming to an end. The reason for my early-ish update is because this weekend I am going on a roady to visit my best friend at his university. With that said, the weekend is going to be a fun one and I cannot wait! This will be a pretty good reward for myself as I worked hard this past month.

In terms of university, I had to write two papers and had two finals that were both cumulative. Therefore, it required a lot of preparation and studying. I am still waiting on the results, but I am hoping for the best. As I have mentioned previously, university can be just as much a gamble as poker at times, but I will continue to roll with the punches. Anyways, I prioritized my education which is the reason why I did not play any poker for almost two weeks.

Instead, I focused my free time on playing sports and going to lift. In combination with eating well, I have dropped some weight and feel stronger and more alpha. Having an outlet in my life where hard work and dedication are justly rewarded is extremely gratifying. My soccer team had our first practice outdoors and it was quite cold, but I am excited for a new season and look forward to being extremely active!

Before I get on with it, I would just like to point out that this update is more of a formality since my profit was almost non existent and my volume was understandably weak.



These are strictly volume fillers or games that I play to warm up when I decide to start a sesh.



Ran pretty horribly in terms of cd and variance, but whatever, it will turn around eventually.



Played these when I could, not much volume and mostly vs. regs. Nice to catch some good bounces.



Just an overall graph combining 10s, 25s and 50s for the month. Naturally the graph looks weird since the 50s graph had an impact, but this is how it looks overall.



Meh. Flicked a few in for some variety/table count.




It was definitely April showers for me, but that is okay. My priorities took over and I cannot worry about what I cannot control. Looking forward to this Summer and my poker grind resumes in May!

Thanks guys,

Elliott

This is a really cool thread, dunno why I havnt seen this b4 wtf.

Like how you set everything out and organise posts/results. You seem like an organised person

Best of luck

keep it up mate glgl

Thanks man. I think it is important to have an organized thread to help me stay focused on accomplishing my goals.

Thanks bro!



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Just got back home from a six hour drive from a roady. Got completely destroyed the entire weekend and I honestly can't remember not having a drink in hand, even in the shower haha. Was a great time, I'll leave it at that!

Back to the real world now!

Today I finally felt sober enough and clear headed enough to put in a poker grind. The action was not very good, so I played mostly lower stakes just to supplement it and also to get warmed up. I made sure to think a lot of spots over and play disciplined. Played roughly 40 games before heading out for lunch with a buddy. Pretty nice weather, just caught up and chilled. Then came back grinded out another ~20 games. Checked my results at the end and was kind of surprised how bad my EV was, but I still think I played well. Just some standard spots that ended up in my favour, that's all.




Probably will not be playing again today as I have soccer practice and then might go out for drinks and watch NHL playoffs (which have been spectacular btw). Today was good to get back into the flow of things, slowly, but steadily.

Well, I played one MTT today while grinding and binked it. Came into final table 3/8 and played intelligently and eventually got heads up. Once I was heads up, I took care of business. There was one spot I am going to post. Pretty sick spot and I ended up folding because I wanted to avoid high variance spots vs villain and just slowly chip away at him instead (which is what I did). Nice way to end the sesh

Villain was very tight and previously check-jammed river on me when he rivered trips and I had an overpair.

Full Tilt Poker Game #36493012498: 1UP Tournament (313127240), Table 15 - NL Hold'em - 5000/10000 Ante 1000 - 18:50:25 ET - 2016/05/13
Seat 3: DarkHorse93 (581,673)
Seat 9: bedbit15 (426,327)
DarkHorse93 antes 1,000
bedbit15 antes 1,000
bedbit15 posts the small blind of 5,000
DarkHorse93 posts the big blind of 10,000
The button is in seat #9
HOLE CARDS
Dealt to DarkHorse93 [Jd 8h]
bedbit15 calls 5,000
DarkHorse93 checks
FLOP [6h Jh Js] (Total Pot: 22,000, 2 Players)
DarkHorse93 checks
bedbit15 bets 20,000
DarkHorse93 calls 20,000
TURN [6h Jh Js] [9s] (Total Pot: 62,000, 2 Players)
DarkHorse93 checks
bedbit15 checks
RIVER [6h Jh Js 9s] [5c] (Total Pot: 62,000, 2 Players)
DarkHorse93 has 15 seconds left to act
DarkHorse93 bets 88,888
bedbit15 raises to 395,327, and is all in
DarkHorse93 has 15 seconds left to act
DarkHorse93 has requested TIME
DarkHorse93 folds
Uncalled bet of 306,439 returned to bedbit15
bedbit15 mucks
bedbit15 wins the pot (239,776)
SUMMARY
Total pot 239,776 | Rake 0
Board: [6h Jh Js 9s 5c]
Seat 3: DarkHorse93 (big blind) folded on the River
Seat 9: bedbit15 (small blind) collected (239,776), mucked