I'm on my phone so I'll keep it short and sweet.

It seems like everything is falling apart in my life at the moment. Poker has taken a backseat due to an unrelenting series of events. I thought we could take some time to talk about the mental game both on and off the felt. I've been dealing with the circumstances with the support of family and friends as well as with booze.

I've lost the enjoyment that I once had from playing music and sports. I did beat my brother with a lefty drive and finish on the court last weekend but the intensity and level of concentration that I usually have was not there. The same lack of intensity and concentration has followed me to the felt. I took about a month off from poker. When I returned to the game the other day my goal was just to have fun and forget about the drama that has surrounded me over the past month. It wasn't as fun as it used to be. This bothers me because I've loved the thrill of competition ever since I was young.

I don't have any questions nor a conclusion. I feel like I'm blowing in the wind at the moment and I don't know how to get back to the level of intensity confidence interest concentration and generally happy feeling that I'm used to.

I know I'm being vague regarding the drama in my life but that's for the sake of the afflicted and their privacy. Sorry.

I'm gonna go listen to "good day" by nappy roots because it always cheers me up.

I hope everyone is doing well.

IIRC, I posted a little while ago that I was finding poker to not be nearly as enjoyable as I once did. I'm very sorry to read that you're having such a difficult time these days and wish you the best.

Thanks Howard.

For the vast majority of us, poker is something to do for fun.

I actually think it is a down-side for most people of turning a hobby into a profession -- you lose the much fun. I know some guys who wanted to turn their love of fly fishing into a guiding business, and it seems like that would suck most of the fun out of it. I love designing things as a job, but it wasn't a hobby first. Also, I want to get paid for it in most cases.

+1 to HB. I hope your hobby returns to being fun. Personally, I haven't played much in the last year. I'm missing it. I hope to return to playing more, soon. Maybe it will work the same for you?

Best of luck, Bob. Gray skies will eventually yield to blue.

poker/life....peaks and valleys....sound familiar?

Look for a new experience imo. Go to a gun range and rent a pistol or rifle and blast away at some paper. Contact a local bike club and go on their next ride. Coach a basketball team (contact the Y or a local elementary school) this winter...preferably 6 years olds (lol...but you will love it). Bake bread for the local soup kitchen. Volunteer at the local senior center. Tons of activities....but try not do solo stuff like going for long walks as they allow time to continue ruminating....

GL

I'd also advocate trying something new. Life has its peaks and valleys, and there's no real shortcuts around the bad parts.

Thanks guys. I'm already in the application process for basketball coaching. I know a member of the MA bball hall of fame and she makes a great reference. Should be a fun winter.

one more....if you are physically "close" to being fit..... learn how to officiate different sports. Done correctly, it is a year round profession/hobby. Tons of fun...and you get paid as well! I currently ONLY officiate boys lacrosse spring, summer and fall.....but have done football and baseball as well.

Quick hint: if you're already feeling depressesd, don't try to treat it by ingesting a depressant.

I might be a little depressed but this is more about the stress causing a feeling of uninterestedness in fun. I'm usually the first to jump at the bit to play a game but instead I've just been apathetic to fun lately.

Sounds like me for most of the last 20 years...and that's without alcohol or drugs to make it worse.

Best Wishes.

+1 to new experiences. My thinking is more along the lines of FLO8, PLO, PLO8, or MIX. Or, go back to 1/2 NL and give that a swirl.

Actually I was playing lots of games that I'm very inexperienced at just before my break. Big O, big O8, 2-7 triple draw, 2-7 single draw, Omaha 8, PLO, NLh, just to name a few. Check out my pg&c thread for details. Also there was some dealers choice mixed in where I was exposed to badugi badacey badeucy and other games that I'm very inexperienced at. It was a fun September but I ended up going busto online, which marked the beginning of the ****storm of bad news and unfortunate events.

Strangely, I'm fine but many of the people that are close to me are suffering. It really puts my losing streak into perspective. It's just a game. It's only money.

Thanks for all the support guys.

I won a nlh freeroll last night, which usually would get me a bit fired up. However this win was bittersweet and my mood was barely affected. Luckily I'm already on a heavy dose of mood stabilizers that I take every day. I'm pretty sure these magic pills are keeping me on an even keel.

Also I've been passing the time by playing chess with friends on my phone. I'm "bojax147" and I'm always down for a challenge even if my heart is heavy and my mind is preoccupied with the drama. Feel free to start a game with me.

Cheers and thanks again for the kind responses. It means a lot.

Hey Bob,

Have you thought of something that might be a great change of pace? Maybe like coaching youth basketball. I know I've considered coaching youth football, because it would be fun to teach a game I enjoy to kids. Maybe it'd be fun for you too?

Just a friendly suggestion.

For what it's worth Bob, I only "know" you from reading your posts on a messageboard for years but based on my limited sample size (poker joke) you seem to be a tremendously nice guy. Maybe I've just had some rungood because most of your posts were to help me learn to play! Maybe if you start talking crap about the Indianapolis Colts that will start a downswing .

Out of curiosity why do you say this? My daughter was an extremely difficult baby who didn't even start sleeping through the night until she was 3, and when I thought I was finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel we got the diagnosis that she was autistic which started a whole chain of events dealing with so-called "experts", therapists and insurance companies, getting to the point where I literally never wanted to do anything - not work, not watch TV, not spend time with the family, everywhere I turned all I could think was "what's the point? I no longer control my life". When I went to see a counselor about it she, on top of all that, diagnosed me with PTSD after all of the bullying I endured throughout junior high and high school.

Getting to the point, she prescribed antidepressants for me, and though they didn't completely cure me I think they did make a difference - I wouldn't say I'm completely happy now but at least I can appreciate my wife, daughter, job, fun, hobbies, travel etc.

Not saying Bob should get on antidepressants by any means, just curious as to why your experience is different than mine. Hope that made sense.

I'm pretty sure rob is right. My dr has advised me to avoid alcohol because I'm on antidepressants. Curiously I'm on them for the antipsychotic and anti anxiety qualities. The antidepressant quality is just a bonus.

Thanks for the kind words dal.

He means alcohol, a depressant, not anti-depressants.

I hope things get better for you Bob.

ROFLMAO improved reading comprehension skills could have saved me spilling my guts!!!!!!

This was NOT sent from my Galaxy S5. It came from the heart and was telepathically transmitted. Seriously, if one line in a post annoys you you need to get a life.

Seems harsh. He was responding to an apparent erroneous assumption in your reply. You acknowledged it. All is good.

Yeah, I wasn't trying to detract from your story. Just making clear that no one had suggested avoiding antidepressants

This is definitely what I meant. I have been on antidepressants myself before, and they were helpful.

"This was sent from my Galaxy S5." <==this used to be my sig when I posted from my phone. I got a PM from a mod threatening to ban me if I didn't disable it because people were complaining about the same line being at the bottom of everybody's posts.

"This was NOT sent from my Galaxy S5. It came from the heart and was telepathically transmitted. Seriously, if one line in a post annoys you you need to get a life." <==this is what I changed it to in a fit of rebellion. You just proved the mod right, so I will disable the sig permanently now.

Please re-read my post without the sig there and see if your reaction to it changes. Thanks.

hang in there bob-man. life has swongs just like poker and they are a bummer. but it seems like you have self-awareness, as well as people supporting you, and those are both important in turning things around imo.

Thanks babar. I do have a great support system.