Finally, the Survivor season we've been waiting for!! ...The Failures vs The Crybabies.

Gen X

Who can forget all those wonderful things that these dip****s made popular:






So yeah, basically **** these ****ers!

Here’s their tribe of losers



Top row, left to right: Lucy Huang, Ken McNickle, Chris Hammons, Jessica Lewis, Rachel Ako, Ciandre "CeCe" Taylor

Bottom row, left to right: David Wright, Paul Wachter, Sunday Burquest, Bret LaBelle

If you’re like me you’re already disgusted by such a lame group of obvious failures and latte chai drinking mother ****ers. If only there was a generation of people even worse than these losers. Oh wait there is….


Millennials

You thought the Gen X’ers were bad, well it should come as no surprise that their offspring is even worse.







Oh well, $200k in debt for a useless degree will just have to be chalked up as a bad life choice.

Here’s their tribe of whiners:



Top row, left to right: Justin "Jay" Starrett, Michaela Bradshaw, Adam Klein, Jessica "Figgy" Figueroa, Michelle Schubert, Will Wahl

Bottom row, left to right: Hannah Shapiro, Taylor Lee Stocker, Mari Takahashi, Zeke Smith

Will they curl up into a ball and cry when they can’t make fire? Will they demand special timeouts during challenges because it’s too stressful? Who cares. Hopefully half will die of starvation because they are vegan, gluten intolerant dumbasses.


Finally, we have our Master of Ceremonies Jeffery. Here’s his cast assessment. This time around he doesn’t say anyone is like Parv so at least this time we won’t know who the winner is before the season starts.



Like me, I know you can’t wait to see this **** show! Let the ridiculous assumptions and predictions begin!

**** My Life

Not really. This is the B show. Better Survivor show currently playing.

australian survivor is legit better than american survivor

but excellent write up! lol!!

When Probst talks about Sunday's chances "I can see her in the final 3. I can also see her being one of the first three to go.' you just know she's going to be awful either way.

Michelle seems like a religious nutjob.

I'm kinda hoping high school kid turns out to be a bit of a douche, instead of being mostly invisible.

While I do appreciate the time and effort you put in, by what definition is Zuckerberg (born 1984) a Generation Xer?

There is no definite date range

Yeah he barely fits but he seems to fit in there more and he's a douchebag too.

Holy **** that cast looks atrocious. I hate everyone already and it hasn't even started yet.

I don't know I watched Jeff"s cast preview and he seemed to think they were a likeable group overall. Seemed like a few people I could root for based on the few seconds they showed each player.

I assumed he meant cuckerburg was produced by genX parents

Went looked through all the Millenials short bios

Some awesome quotes

As someone born between these two generations, I can **** on them both, so this is excellent.

Jay

Based only on the seven-minute preview and my own generational biases I rate the Gen X tribe as -400 favorites to be the dominant tribe in challenges/camp life in the early weeks.

Well it's good that Fabio's younger brother (Taylor) and Cochran/Aubrey clone Hannah both made the cut.

I'm thinking Zeke and Bret might give us a few good one liners at least.

Wow I see it the other way. I feel like the Millennials are gonna stomp all over the Gen-Xers in the first few challenges

I be posting soon.

Triggered!! I'm older than both groups.

(Fortunately I have teenage daughters so I know what triggered means.)

QUOTE=Soncy;50826253]I be posting soon.[/QUOTE]

Awesome!! Missed your posts so much last season.

My expectations for this season couldn't be lower. But that means there's nowhere to go but up!

Looking forward to the endless string of microaggressions (against logic and good sense) that typically occur in these threads.

In

Don't get your hopes up too much Clovis. Supposedly a highly religulous cast.

I'm gonna go wild and pick Figgy to win, even though I don't have a good feeling about it. She just reminds me of Michelle last season, so let's go for 2 in a row

how many people are left usually on day 36?

Big fan of that advantage structure

Five.

GTO with that advantage has to be to tell everyone, right? Build trust, and don't hurt yourself at all in the short term. Day One to Day 36 is a looooong way.