I agree with aaron on this. The very fact that you are teaching them independent thinking, is forcing a way of thinking, a set of beliefs, on them, that they didnt arrive at independently! By not telling them how you vote, you foster a certain way of looking at or thinking about politics, depending on the personalities of the child and parent. It might be that you not discussing politics does not result in them being politically independent thinkers, it might be that they end up thinking politics is unimportant, or latching on to the first person that does talk about politics, or any number of results, probably unrelated to the goal you held of them being able to think independently.

What do you mean by independent thinking? I guess you mean, to use reason and evidence and logic to arrive at a conclusion? Or do you mean, to arrive at your own worldview and belief system, independently of anyone else?

If its the second, that just doesnt happen, to anyone, ever.

Well I think YOU AND YOUR WIFE'S opinions and believes should be the only 2 that make these decisions, and the only 2 that matter.
And you and your wife have made a big mistake by not making these decisions, before!! having children, and frankly shame on you 2 for not doing so.
Your or your wife's family should not have any say in these matters, and should respect any decision you 2 make in these matters, not saying they can't express their opinions/beliefs, but no more then that.

And putting/leaving your child on a school that in your words "shove religion down your throat" would be a very wrong decision since neither one of you is a devoted and church going Christian.
But does not mean you can't put him in a school that has Christian values, but lets the children/parents the choice how deep/much you want to practice his/yours beliefs, but does teach religion, so your child has a idea what religion means/is, since a child still has no real choice/idea if he wants to be religious until the age of at least 15/16 years old imo or comprehends what it means in regards to his life[style].

And I myself are not religious at all or being raised as such, but I do belief that every child should be teached about or learned that religion exists, and since often there are, depending where or how big a city you live in little schools that not have Christian or Catholic or whatever other religion in their name, many of them do not impose/teach about religion very intensely, other then having a class that teaches religion [being the Catholic or Christian or whatever other religion beliefs] and the Catholic or Christian being the biggest percentage of them, and seeing your wife does want too have your son/children some level of Christianity beliefs being learned and you don't seem too oppose some level of religion being learned to your son so long it is not to much forced and in moderation, I think depending where you live, there must be a school for him that both you and your wife can live with.

I wish you and your wife all the wisdom you need to make the right decision, where you both are happy with.

It is fine if this is your opinion but you should realize this represents a culturally bias point of view. Namely, the trend toward individualism in the West. I would be surprised to hear this view espoused from persons with Middle Eastern or Asian descent.

Ahhh internet shame... the worst kind. btw I hope you are married with kids doling out this kind of high and mighty advice... if not gtfo.

As far as my situation- what I believe has changed over time. When we got married we likely had close to identical belief systems. Because belief systems are dynamic and not static (and should be dynamic) it is not really realistic IMO to just "make decisions" before having kids.

For this reason I am willing to concede quite a bit with my wife because I am the one after all that kind of changed beliefs partway through the "game".

For now we have agreed on a school that focuses on a second language that is government funded and non-religious... should be good. Now the kids only need to hang in there for sunday school

Neeel,

I don't think anyone is aiming at absolute objectivity. I think it helps to consider it as a sliding scale from 1-10. If 10 is like completely brainwashed and devoid of the ability to think critically and 1 is a completely objective free thinking being ...

We want our kids to be closer to 1 than to 10. Thinking in black and white is something kids are often predisposed to. As parents we can either reinforce this or encourage questioning/critical thought/contemplation.

In short, we provide a service to kids by teaching them how to think rather than just telling them what to think.

Herein lies the problem with so much of religion. For the most part religion is not an exercise in discovery and contemplation, it is often just a list of beliefs (doctrine) we are encouraged to adopt.

When taught the wrong way, the same can be said of math. Here's how you do long division: Divide, subtract, multiply, bring down. It doesn't matter whether you understand what you're doing as long as you do what you're told.

I don't fault either math or religion for this problem.

Yeah agreed. The principle can be applied to most anything... It is better to comprehend the "why" than simply follow directives without any actual understanding.

In relation to parenting I think most people itt are on the same page of wanting to teach kids to reason and think versus raising marines that follow orders without questioning.

PS. I feel that I should also mention I am not anti-religion or anti-christian. My posts of late probably make it seem like I am a hater. I have been putting off starting a religious blog for a long time so I don't know if I will get to it. I am not sure the world needs another religious blog but it would probably help me anyway to solidify my thoughts and "problems" with modern Christianity.

In the meantime I will see if I can track down MB in a thread here and troll him

I agree with you about the math part. I think the way math tends to be taught makes it dry and boring when it could be fun and more effective.

But that's a tangent. What is the correct way to teach religion?

Living it out in thoughtful consideration with others.

if you mean all action and no preaching, that sounds good to me

Then it doesn't sound good to you.

this doesn't follow

True. But it makes my point.

what point is that?

If I make a statement that doesn't agree with this, what do you believe I'm trying to indicate?

that you endorse preaching?

if that's it, I still don't get your point

either way, how about getting to the point instead of trying to make me guess wtf you're talking about

I said:

You said:

I do not mean all action and no preaching.

Yeah, that's what I figured. What do you mean and why do you assume it wouldn't sound good to me?

I inferred from your statement that you're anti-preaching. I agree it's not a logical necessity based on the wording, but there's a bit of implicature there.

Anyway, humans place meaning on statements or behaviors based on their own understanding of a situation. If their understanding is not correct, then they reach incorrect conclusions. It is often necessary for people to actually communicate with words in order to explain their thoughts or motivations. It is also important for learning how to think and reason within various intellectual and emotional frameworks.

Preaching is one of many ways of conveying information to others about these inner workings. Therefore, there is value to it.

I don't tend to think of it as preaching per se, but I like to try to persuade people toward my opinions and points of view as much as the next guy

it wouldn't be very reasonable to have a problem with other people doing the same thing